The Serpent and the Unicorn
by Lady Liadan
Summary: When the Houses of Malfoy and Black joined in alliance, it was celebrated as a triumph for the old bloodlines. Few knew of the treachery and lies that had forged the union. Lucius Malfoy needed to read his wife’s diary to truly see the deception.
1. An Unexpected Find

**Introduction**

This story is a stand-alone and does not take place in the universe of the stories _The Secret of Sartorius_ and _The Promise of Sartorius_. As a matter of fact, the stories contradict each other quite a bit as Lucius is presented as a different person with a different past and motivations.

The timeline of the story runs in parallel with _The Order of the Phoenix_. Draco is in his fifth year at school, and Voldemort has returned. There are also flashbacks to the late seventies when Lucius and the Black sisters were in their late teens and early twenties. However, you don't have to have read the book, as there are no spoilers and only minimal cross-references to events in the novel.

I have introduced only marginal OCs in this fanfic, and I have tried to keep the main characters as close to the image that is presented in the HP novels as possible. However, I have fleshed out some of the supporting characters such as the Black family, in particular Narcissa and her sisters.

While I am planning on less raunchy sex in this fanfic , the topics I deal with will tend to be darker and more violent. There will be scenes of torture, murder, rape (hinted at) and sexual encounters that are only consensual to a certain extent. So the story will still need to be rated a very strong R.

Otherwise the usual disclaimers are in place.

**An Unexpected Find **

_Him_

Lucius Malfoy ran his hand over his forehead and tossed back his long, silvery blond hair. Above him, amidst the gathering clouds lightning played, piercing the humid darkness. It would rain soon, washing away the blood that pooled on the ground before him. No downpour, however, could extinguish the cuts and bruises on the pale skin of the dying naked woman at his feet. She still moved feebly and a detached part of him admired her stamina. By rights she had earned a dignified death, but other concerns had precedence.

He cast a sharp glance out of pale eyes at his companion who was busy undoing his robes. Seth Avery might be a loyal Death Eater and capable fighter, but in Lucius' opinion he had rather filthy habits. "I will spare myself the sight," he said curtly, regardless of the disgust that crept into his voice. "See that you vanish the body when you're done here. I'll be in the house."

He turned on his heel, his black robes swirling around his legs and strode off towards the dimly lit outline of a doorway that shimmered through the tall trees of the garden. Soon he had made his way across a narrow patio and stood in the living-room of a small slightly ramshackle house. His lips twitched in revulsion at the sight of the man and two small children that lay on the threadbare carpet of the living-room. Their limbs looked strangely contorted, yet their deaths had been easy in comparison to the one that awaited the woman outside.

He worked his boot under the belly of the man and rolled him over so he could look into his face. "Miserable muggle," he hissed with a sneer. "She was a pureblood witch, but she had to pollute her noble bloodline with filth like you! And what did you do to protect her, or your spawn? Nothing! The last thing she'll know before she dies will be another man fucking her. Some husband you were! Even in death you disgust me!" He gave the corpse another kick to turn him back over.

He could sense his old fury rise in him like an irresistible surge of sudden fire. He knew the feeling well, and as always he fought to concentrate on the blazing flames, not on the spark that had first ignited them. Yet, unbidden, the image appeared before his eyes: her beautiful, noble, pale face framed by hair the color of raven wings, her lithe body so full of life, and once so full of promise to him.

He still remembered how she had made him feel. But she had turned from him and when last he'd seen her, her eyes had lost their laughter for him, her lips had been cold to his desperate kiss and her slender arms encircled another. He exhaled sharply, unsheathed his wand and vanished the corpses.

His outburst of anger slowly evaporated with the dissolving flesh of his victims. It had been so long ago, and only the hatred had remained. He looked at his surroundings to distract himself. Who could live in such squalor? The Rookwood family owned a large mansion in Lancashire, but Cecilia Rookwood had married a muggle and her family had cast her out. It seemed by the appearance of their dwelling-place that her husband had provided as little support to his family in life as he had in death.

Still, there was time to kill now, and Lucius looked around drawn to a large bookshelf at the back of the room. Thunder rumbled outside. The wizard leaned his cane against the backrest of the sofa and stripped off his black leather gloves. His long pale fingers ran along the leather spines of a sizeable collection of magical books. It seemed that Cecilia Rookwood had brought an impressive magical dowry along with her after all, despite the fact that her family had disowned her.

Suddenly a slim, maroon leather back caught his attention. Faded silver embossing showed a twelve-pointed star with a unicorn beneath and below it the motto _tujours pur_. The book must have once belonged to a member of the Black family. Lucius slipped the volume from the shelf and gently spread the crackling stiffened parchment leaves. The book was covered in a dense fluid script that he recognized immediately as that of his wife. He turned the leaves and looked at the dates. "Beauxbatons, January 3rd 1975," read the first entry.

Just then he heard a heavy footfall outside on the patio and quickly slipped the book into his robes as Seth Avery entered the house. "Bloody rain," the man snarled and tore the mask from his face. Lucius tapped his foot. "Are we done here?" he asked testily. Avery shook his robes out. "Yeah," he said. "She's gone." He didn't see his companion's lips curl in a brief display of scorn. "Let's go," commanded Lucius.

"What? Aren't we going to blast the place?" Avery asked. The blond wizard sighed. "Now why would we want to do that? She was cooperating with the aurors, and she betrayed her family. She has been punished. I am not interested in sending an official challenge to the Ministry. Those concerned will get the warning, those who shouldn't know won't find out this was our doing." He wanted nothing more than to go home and get out of the sight of the man who faced him.

* * *

Malfoy Manor loomed darkly against a dense layer of clouds. It was late. The thunderstorm that had broken during the raid in Somerset had not reached Wiltshire, but a light wind dispelled the heat of the humid summer night. Lucius adjusted after the brief disorientation that came with an apparition and smoothed down his robes. A faint light burned behind the tall windows of the salon. Narcissa would still be awake and waiting for him.

He paused and sighed. There were nights like these where he came back from a raid where he felt an uneasy balance of relief at coming home, at leaving the disturbing memories of his terrified and dying victims behind, and of regret at having to lock himself back up in the responsibilities of his mundane life as a husband and father.

Narcissa's embrace would make the screaming stop, would obliviate the memories, but it would also remind him of what might have been, yet what never had. He walked over the soft crunch of the gravel of the drive-way and up the broad stairs to the deep portal of the house.

A house-elf awaited him in the hall and took his Death Eater robes and mask. Lucius tucked the diary into the inside pocket of his coat and walked down the corridor to the salon. He quietly opened the tall door and stepped into the dimly lit room. His wife sat by the window in a deep chair and had fallen asleep while reading a book.

"Cissa," he called to her softly, and she opened her eyes and smiled at him. She put the book aside and got up with the light, fluid grace that all the Black women shared and that he admired so much in her. She wore a deep blood-red velvet gown and her rich honey-blond hair flowed freely over her shoulders.

As she reached him, she flung her arms around him and laid her head on his chest. "You are back," she sighed. He smiled and pressed a kiss into her hair. "Of course I am, dearest. Did you think I would not return?" He felt her shake her head while her embrace tightened. "It is dangerous. I worry every time you leave." He stroked her back to soothe her. "We encountered no resistance," he said calmly. "We surprised them."

She sighed and looked up at him. "Who was it this time?" she asked. He tilted his head. Normally she knew better than to ask, but he decided to humor her. "Cecilia Markham, once known as Cecilia Rookwood, before she decided to disgrace her family." Narcissa took a surprised step back. "Celia? You killed Celia? I was at Beauxbatons with her. She was my friend until she got involved with that muggle."

Lucius held her wide-eyed look with a steely grey stare of his own. "Cissa, she married that muggle. She bore him two mudblood children, and she was working with aurors at the Ministry against the followers of the Dark Lord. She needed to be taken out." His wife swallowed. "Of course, dear. You just surprised me. I didn't expect she would turn against her own people to that extent."

The blond wizard decided to change the topic. Narcissa had returned to her demure self almost immediately, but he thought that the information had upset her more than she cared to show him. He gently grasped her chin and tilted her head up at him. "Come, let's go to bed." His lips curved in a small smile. "You must have had a good reason to wait up for me, and I'd hate to disappoint you."

As they walked towards their bedroom, Lucius felt briefly tempted to mention the discovery of her diary to his wife, but something held him back, perhaps it was his reluctance to remind her of Cecilia's fate, perhaps the anticipation of having her stretched out beneath him in a few more minutes, willing and pliant, distracted him, but as he cast off his robes and watched her undress the book remained secreted in the breast pocket of his coat.

She came to him, her naked slender body shimmering in the twilight of their bedchamber. Her cool hands caressed his bare chest and her lips traced a trail of fire down from his neck to the first stirrings of his erection. He threaded his fingers in her silken hair, rolled his head back on his shoulders and closed his eyes.

In his mind the blond hair that coolly brushed against his stomach and thighs transformed to raven black, the thin ruby lips that caressed him bloomed into a broad, bee-stung sensuous curve and the small plump hands that grasped his hips lengthened until they possessed the delicate elegance that perhaps a master carver would achieve in a sculpture.

As she took the full length of his cock into her mouth he clenched his teeth to keep himself from breathing the name of the one that filled his every waking and dreaming desire, the name of her, who was lost to him forever.

As always Narcissa was blissfully unaware of his thoughts. He would never fail in his duties as her husband, and truth be told, no full-blooded man in their right mind could dream of calling it a chore, yet what he had with her did not live up to the expectations he had once held of his married life.

He had the presence of mind to stop her skilful ministrations just short of his complete satisfaction and lifted her with ease to place her on the soft silk sheets of their broad bed. She stretched out beneath him, her lavender eyes looking up at him expectantly. She breathed through lightly parted lips and he bent over her to kiss her while his hands ravished her body. She arched into the firm roughness of his touch.

Lucius felt the beat of his heart pound in his ears. Dimly he thought he heard again the screams of Cecilia Rookwood, and his own relentless questions. "I need names! Who do you work with? Who have you implicated? Tell me! You cannot resist! _Crucio_!"

"Lucius!" A soft cry brought him back. He blinked in surprise and saw his wife's wide-eyed stare. "Lucius, you're hurting me. What is it?" With an effort of will he unclamped the hands that held Narcissa's arms in a bruising grip and briefly lowered his head to breathe a kiss onto her chest. He would not apologize, he never did, but he had not meant to hurt her, either. Some nights it just became harder and harder to banish the demons.

He forced his concentration into the moment as he readied her until he finally heard her quietly beg. He paused for a moment, then guided himself inside her. As he started moving, he had to admit that he rode her harder than he really had to, but while she suppressed a gasp at every stroke with which he pounded into her, she did not complain again.

He fought for self-control to hold on until he heard her softly moan and felt her body briefly quiver beneath him. His brows furrowed in annoyance at the subtlety of her reactions that often kept him guessing whether he was able to please her at all. Yet, he knew it was her way. His quiet, secretive, elegant wife showed as much polite poise in bed as she would at a society tea party. No effort of his would ever turn her into a screaming, writhing devotee of passion.

He looked for a moment into her pale, blank face, then curved his hands around her shoulders to hold her against him, closed his eyes and finally concentrated on his own needs. A few more strokes sent him over the edge and he stifled his own groans of release against her cool, sweat-slicked skin. She had completely stilled beneath him, and with an effort he raised himself above her, withdrew and rolled to the side.

His hand trailed along her body once, then he pulled the sheets over both of them and briefly kissed her cheek. He suddenly felt bone-achingly tired. For a moment he thought that he hadn't even bothered to wash the stink of the kill off him before he'd gone to bed, then darkness closed over him. Beside him his wife stared unseeing and wide-eyed into the night.

_

* * *

Her_

Beauxbatons, January 3rd 1975

Well, I guess Bella's Yule present isn't exactly original, but I haven't been keeping a diary for a while, and it might be fun to write down what happens over the next few months. After all, this summer I'll be sitting my NEWTs and my time at Beauxbatons will be over.

Anyway, today was the first day of school after the holidays and frankly I'm glad to be back. At least I can hang out with Celia, Monique and Denise and talk to people who actually understand me. Staying at home for the celebrations was pretty boring. We had a ton of extended family over as guests, and Mother and Father are really looking for a suitable husband for Bella now. How icky is that? I mean they made her wear all those low-cut robes and paraded her around in front of all these men like she was a prize hippogriff they were trying to sell! I didn't get to talk to her much, but she seemed really annoyed at it herself.

When she could she got herself into a quiet corner with that weird-looking spooky guy from the Lestranges. Mum hates him. They were always talking in whispers, and whenever I came by they would shut up and glare at me. What did they think I would do? Tell any of their precious secrets? Bella knows I can keep my mouth shut, at least when she tells me a secret. Andy's of course I'd pass on any opportunity I'd get. She is such an annoying big sister. Always bossing me around. I stayed out of her way during the holidays. At least this year she's not at school any more to get in my hair.

Well, that's all I can think of for now. I better see what Celia is doing and get started on my transfiguration homework. Madame Lacroix can get pretty cranky when spells don't work out.


	2. The Morning after the Storm

**The Morning After the Storm**

_Him_

Light filtered through the thin muslin curtains that shrouded the tall windows of the bedroom. Lucius stretched with a yawn and opened his eyes as he noticed a familiar sweetish smell. "Damn you," he whispered and shook the body of his wife who was stretched out beside him. She showed no reaction and he brought his face close to hers only to feel the smell increase to sickening intensity.

His lips twitched in disgust and disappointment. She had secretly taken that sleeping draught again after he had dozed off last night, and the stink of belladonna and other opiates shrouded her like a cloying cloud of forgetfulness. She would be lost to the world for the better part of the day. Narcissa's reliance on the potion struck Lucius, who valued a clear head above everything else, as abusive, but they had fought about it without avail. She kept buying the stuff, hiding it, and taking it.

He felt a brief twinge of guilt as he saw the bruises he had given her the evening before. The shapes of his fingers were outlined in purple against the pale creamy skin of her upper arms. Then he dismissed the feeling with an effort of will. He knew only too well that if he hadn't told her about the victim of the raid last night, if he hadn't stayed out for so long, if he hadn't taken her quite so hard, she probably wouldn't have drunk the stuff. The wizard was still not sure whether the drug habit was his wife's impassive way of paying him back for perceived transgressions or whether she was really that weak. He knew, however, that he hated having to think about her as a liability instead of as a partner.

He knew that ultimately he had himself to blame. Whenever had anyone heard of a Malfoy settling for second best? Yet for once in his life that was what he had done. Now he was paying the price for his own weakness. He tore the sheets off him, called for a house elf to prepare his bath and left the bedroom, slamming the door in frustration.

* * *

A little while later in the large cavernous dining hall Lucius found himself sitting alone at the elaborately laid out breakfast table. "Where's my son?" he snarled at a house elf who poured his tea. "M-m-master, t-t-the young master is still abed," stammered the elf. Lucius brought his face close to his servant's so the creature staggered back in fright, almost stepping off the table with his heavy load of the teapot. "Well – then wake him!" he hissed.

He watched the elf scramble from the room and with an exasperated sigh opened the newspaper that his owl had brought. Last night's raid had not made the headlines. Of course all the investigators would have to go on was a half muggle, half wizarding family that had simply vanished without a trace. It might take weeks before anyone cared to follow up on the disappearances. The Dark Lord would be pleased with his and Avery's performance.

A quick footfall made him look up from the paper. Draco stalked into the room slamming the door behind him and scowled as he sat down at the long table. "Morning," he growled. Lucius carefully folded the _Daily Prophet_, his eyes never leaving his son who now leaned halfway across the table to pull the toast rack over to him. It was a deliberate lapse in good manners and as such an obvious gesture of defiance.

"Excuse me, Draco!?" The older wizard's voice was icy as he accepted the challenge. "What?!" protested the boy in mock outrage. "You will address me properly and give me the time of day, not that muggle-mumble you just tried. If you wish to eat, you will ask me politely to pass food to you, or you will instruct a house elf to do so. I will not have a Malfoy behave like a pig around me, no matter how barbaric the table manners at school may have become under your current, spineless headmaster. Do you understand me?!"

Lucius had his son's full attention now, and the grey eyes of his opposite had narrowed in resentment and fear. "However, before we get even started, you will apologize to me for being late for breakfast. – Now!" Draco bit his lips. "I'm sorry father, I'm late." Then he recovered somewhat. "Mother isn't here, either." Lucius slammed his fist on the white damasked tablecloth making the crockery jump and rattle. Draco flinched.

"We have had a discussion about talking back, have we not? Your behavior is simply inexcusable. Your mother has her own reasons for being late this morning. However, regardless, I have told you that while you are here for the summer you will join me at breakfast at 8:30 every morning, unless I send you an elf to tell you otherwise. You know that you have a full program of work every day. You have sessions with your private tutor to make up for your deplorable lack of progress in runes and transfiguration and to properly learn the Dark Arts in the morning and you have quiddich training in the afternoons. This leaves you no time for lazing away your time in bed!"

The older wizard leaned back, his voice dropping to a quiet, threatening hiss. "Now, you will leave the room, you will come back and close the door quietly behind yourself. You will respectfully wish me a good morning, sit down again and have a house elf wait on you. Then I might forget your ridiculous lapse of judgment just then. If you insist on behaving like an uneducated mudblood around me, be assured, I will treat you like one." Draco glared briefly at his father, then lowered his eyes and slunk from the room like a kicked dog.

* * *

Lucius Malfoy spent the better part of the morning and the afternoon in his study taking care of his extensive business ventures. Letters needed to be written on Ministry matters, and at around noon a young male Veela flooed in from Russia to report on the latest fur trade figures. The Malfoys had a large branch office that took care of several legal and as many illegal business ventures in St. Petersburg, and Lucius had not been pleased to see the reports on his latest profit margins. Particularly poaching for jarvey furs in Siberia had not gone well during the last season.

Veela, both male and female, were proud, temperamental and powerful, and when his assistant had finally left with full instructions, the wizard felt exhausted. It was about time for tea. He briefly contemplated ordering the elves to lay out a meal, but knew that Narcissa would still be incapacitated by her potion and that Draco would hopefully be still holed up with his tutors. Eventually he settled on having one of his servants bring him a tray of food to his study.

He continued reading documents as he ate absentmindedly, paying no attention to the exquisite taste of the food that the elves had prepared for him, and finally pushed the tray out of his way. He folded up the documents and leaned back in his chair when suddenly his eyes fell on a slim maroon volume on one of the side tables. It seemed the house elves had removed the book from his undoubtedly blood-stained coat when they had taken it to be cleaned and put it here.

Lucius got up and palmed the small leather-bound book. He yawned, ordered a cognac from the elf that had scuttled in to take away the tray and settled into his reading chair by the window. After this day's labors he had deserved a little distraction. One of the entries in the diary had read 1975. In 1975 there had still been hope. It had been a dizzying, wonderful, exciting year until that fateful day in October when all his dreams had shattered.

* * *

_Her_

Beauxbatons, April 12th 1975

Keeping a diary seems more trouble than I thought. Now it's been over three months since I've looked at it, and so much has happened. Well, let's see if I can get caught up. I guess the biggest surprise for everyone has been Bella's bold move. She's eloped with Rodolphus Lestrange! They returned home after the secret handfasting, and I am sure that father would have hexed the groom to the dark side of the moon if mother hadn't intervened. As she pointed out, while the Lestranges are not very rich they are from a good bloodline.

Bella has been a dear and visited with Rodolphus at school the other week, to introduce me properly to my new brother-in-law, she joked. He seems nicer than I thought at Yule. At least he talks to me like I'm a grown up person.

Bella was in a good mood. She says she's met great and influential people and that her life will now take a turn for the better. She was also joking that I'd probably have to marry me someone with money now, seeing that she had missed out on that. – Rodolphus started mock-wrestling her at that point, and I was a bit embarrassed when they ended up snogging like crazy. It's weird to think of my fave sister as married now. Still she's right, though. Andy is such a drip, she can't be relied on getting anything right. It's Bella and I that are a team, and we'll always be, no matter what.

I guess from what Bella told me our parents were both afraid of the strange mark that she and Rodolphus now have on their arms. They showed it to me and it looks really odd, a skull with a serpent, a bit like a tattoo, but it seems more like burnt than inked in.

I first thought that maybe it was some extreme love-pact thing, but there seems to be more to it. Both became very secretive when I asked about it. Bella just said: "Any wizard with common sense will know better now than to cross us. We have very powerful friends. Little sister, I'm telling you, you will see more of this mark very soon. Perhaps, one of these days I'll tell you everything. Perhaps you'll even bear it yourself."

Honestly, I don't know about that. It looks ugly. It also looks like getting it would hurt quite a bit. But I trust Bella to be looking out for me.

* * *

Black Manor, June 2nd 1975

Summer holidays are finally here, I did okay on my NEWTs, we had a bunch of enjoyable parties including my seventeenth birthday party, and I'm back at home. And today I just had the most incredible encounter ever. Dear diary, I have met the man I am going to marry. I just know it! I was in the salon looking over some dress robes fabrics with mother when one of the house-elves showed in this young man. I swear, I thought I was going to faint on the spot. I don't even know if I can describe him and do him justice.

He is slim and tall and has the most amazing white-blond hair that he wears open. In most guys that would probably look ridiculous, but he just pulls it off, looking half dangerous, half drop-dead gorgeous. His face has this really proud and aristocratic expression and his mouth is just begging to be kissed. But most amazing are those pale grey eyes of his. So he walked in behind our elf dressed in black and green velvet, head held high as if he owned the place. I think I must have looked like a total loon, because he started talking to mother and it took me a few minutes before I even got caught on.

It appears he is the only son of Octavian Malfoy, and his father had sent him over to talk about some Malfoy business concern with father. He is supposed to learn about his family's trade and take over eventually. But part of that I got from mother later, because I just listened to the tone of his voice without taking in the words. When he talks it just gives me goose-bumps. Gods, the voice is just amazing, a bit gravelly, yet smooth as silk, and he speaks every word as if he was caressing it with his tongue before he decides on using it.

Anyway, I think I came round enough when mother introduced me to not make a complete fool of myself, and was able to string two sentences together without stuttering or blushing too much, praise be to Isis! Lucius – that's his name – seemed nice enough, and I just wish I had worn something more elegant and had done something to my hair. I could have made a better impression. Instead I had on Andy's ugly cast-off violet robes and my hair up in a boring bun. I could kick myself!

Well, next time he comes round I'll be prepared! I'll owl Bella and ask her for advice. I think mother knows I am having quite a crush, because she was teasing me about it a bit, but she seems pleased about it rather than otherwise. Still, she said something that is really making me worried.

She told me that in the good families the daughters should be married off by age, so with Bella taken it would be Andy's turn next. I would need to wait my proper turn. Well, I hope my stupid sister makes up her mind fast and gets hitched, because I know who I'm going to go after! Lucius… Just writing the name gives me shivers…


	3. Before the Dark Lord

**Before the Dark Lord**

_Him _

Lucius closed and lowered the book. He also remembered the 2nd of June 1975, but for different reasons. Reading Narcissa's diary and her description of her reaction to him surprised him. He could barely recall their first encounter and only dimly remembered a skinny, nervous, honey-blonde girl who had awkwardly stumbled through their introductions.

His mind had been not on her but on making a favorable impression on Mrs. Black, an imposing dark-haired woman with a sharp, proud face. For the last few months he had been sent out by Octavian Malfoy with introductions to all of the old man's business contacts in preparation to taking over control of the family business from his father. His two older sisters had been profitably married off some time ago. He had finished his studies at Hogwarts two years before, and now at 19 he was being groomed by his father for his role in wizarding society.

He had chatted quite amicably with the older witch, who seemed to be pleased with his attentions. She had eventually accompanied him herself to meet her husband, and had let him into his study. He had greeted Mr. Black and handed him the letter of introduction that Octavian had written for him. As old Mr. Black was reading, the door to his rooms had opened again. Lucius remembered looking back over his shoulder, half expecting Mrs. Black to have returned.

A moment later he had to remind himself to keep breathing. A young woman had entered the study and began talking in a deep, melodious voice. When she realized that her father had a visitor, she had simply stopped herself and smiled at him. He had drunk in her face, forgetting where and who he was. She was tall and slender, clad in a dove-grey linen and velvet dress. A cascade of bluish black hair framed her delicate oval face and tumbled down her back. It shimmered like a midnight black flood of silk one could drown in.

Lucius had looked into deep mauve-grey eyes that seemed for a moment to gaze into the deepest wells of his soul. Then Miss Black had laughed softly, full cinnamon-colored lips revealing the flash of perfectly even white teeth. "Father," she said. "You could have warned me we had guests. I almost gave away the outcome of our latest trade negotiations with the Persian Magical Trade Association."

And that was how he had met for the first time Andromeda Black, the woman who had eventually broken his heart. Unlike her willful, impulsive and somewhat spoilt sisters Andromeda relied on self-control and her quite formidable intelligence to make her way. In breach of the traditions of most of the old houses her father confided in her with regards to all of his business dealings, despite the fact that she was a woman. Lucius discovered over the next few months that he relied heavily on her help and advice.

During that fateful afternoon old Arcturus Black had simply introduced Lucius to his daughter as one would one business associate to another, remarking that as Octavian's son he would probably be dealing a lot with her in the future, and Andromeda had pulled up a chair without hesitation. A few minutes later all three of them were engrossed in their discussion, though Lucius had to admit to fighting hard to overcome the distraction that her presence caused him.

Reliving his memories and comparing them to Narcissa's notes Lucius could not escape noticing the irony. Both he and his future wife had seemingly been struck by infatuation at the same time, but tragically it had not been for each other. It occurred to the blond wizard that most of the unhappy events of their lives thereafter had sprung directly from the cruel joke that fate had played that day both on him and on the woman who now bore his name.

Slowly he got up and placed the diary on his desk. Still wrapped in thought he walked over to the tall window that faced the garden and looked out over the park, now grey in the twilight of evening. He didn't really take any note of his surroundings. The sudden intensity with which he remembered Andromeda surprised and hurt him. Over the years he had locked away his memories of her with ruthless thoroughness. Yet he had thought of her the other night when he had looked at Cecilia Rookwood's husband, and hatred had lowered his defenses. Now reading Narcissa's diary had brought every nuance of her appearance back in vivid and excruciating detail.

She had been beautiful beyond words. Of all the spirits and gods he knew through his magical practice she had reminded him most of the old Greek pagan goddess Athena, she of the high, pale, war-helmeted forehead, spirit of intelligence and invention, the grey-eyed virgin who bore the owl of wisdom on her shoulder, daughter of the father of gods. He had by no means been inexperienced when he'd met her, but all of his sexual encounters so far confirmed him in his resolve that he had to have her.

He had left the Black house that day with the promise of Mr. Black that he would be allowed to call on his daughter should he so wish. Andromeda had simply smiled at him mysteriously as she had taken his hand into her long, slim, delicate fingers, and he had apparated back at Malfoy Manor on a cloud of giddy and delirious happiness.

Lucius took a deep breath and tried to clear his thoughts, when suddenly he felt the dark mark of the Death Eaters flare up in sudden pain, and as he peeled back his left sleeve he saw the skull and snake outlined in vivid charcoal black against the pale skin of his forearm. He sighed, but moved immediately to order a house elf to bring his cloak and mask. Then he picked up his cane deciding he would not bother to inform his still half-drugged wife where he was going and prepared to apparate before his master.

* * *

The meeting place was already shrouded in the gathering gloom of night, and he noted with some satisfaction that he was one of the first Death Eaters to arrive. In the center of the clearing he could make out the tall skeletal figure of Lord Voldemort. Without hesitation he strode up to him and knelt before him, lowering his head in submission. "I am here, master, your loyal servant. Command me and I will do your bidding." He felt a powerful and cruel will bent on him as the Dark Lord regarded him. "It is well, Lucius," a cold voice answered. "Take your place. I will assuredly be in need of your service tonight."

Lucius raised himself with calm elegance, carefully hiding his distaste at being made to humble himself in this manner and stepped over to join a handful of dark-robed figures who began to flesh out into a circle as others apparated, paid their homage and filled the ranks.

As usual the three last arrivals were served a mild dose of the _cruciatus_ by their master, and when they had finally staggered over to their places in the coven, Lord Voldemort addressed them all. Lucius found his mind wander against his will as the Dark Lord spoke of their progress with regards to young Potter and some of the other projects and raids that had been going on since their last gathering. He came back to the present when he heard Voldemort speak his name.

"And finally, Lucius, why don't you let us know about your latest raid with Seth Avery." The blond wizard stepped forward and gave a terse account of the assassination of Cecilia Rookwood and her family. He hesitated briefly, then decided to mention the fact that Avery had taken care to dishonor the dying witch before they had left.

As he spoke he noted a slight movement off to his side and knew without a doubt that it had to be Alvin Rookwood, Cecilia's brother, who seemed unable to hide his surprise, if not his distress at the news. Voldemort had noted it to, and after commending his Death Eaters on their job and dismissing Lucius he ordered Rookwood before him.

"Unmask yourself," he instructed the wizard who had sunk to his knees before him. "Tell me Alvin," he asked, his voice deceptively gentle. "What do you wish to say to those who restored your family's honor?" And quaking with fear Rookwood debased himself and scrambled over on his knees to Avery and Malfoy and kissed the hems of their robes and thanked them for lifting the stain of the dishonor of his sister's marriage from his house.

Lucius lips curled with distaste under his mask at the undignified behavior he was made to witness, but he merely inclined his head and accepted Rookwood's words. No need to be more of an asset to a pureblood's debasement than was absolutely necessary. He had two sisters himself and he would kill any man who dared to lift a hand against either of them, regardless of the nature of their transgression. Voldemort should have allowed Rookwood to take care of the matter himself.

Eventually Cecilia's brother was allowed to take his former place in the circle and to cover his face again. Voldemort now stepped forward and everyone remained deathly quiet. Dark energy filled the circle and finally their master spoke again. "There is a traitor in our midst," he hissed and a swift shudder of fear passed through the attendants. Robes rustled as wizards and witches cast furtive glances at each other.

Lucius saw a tall shape on the opposite end of the circle take a small step back. He suspected that it was Severus Snape, who tended to be a bit jumpy when it came to talk of betrayal. One of these days he would follow up on those subtle signals and find out whether the Hogwarts potions master had a reason for his nervousness.

"Horace Bellings, step forward! Off with your mask!" Voldemort's emaciated pale hand pointed at a man three people to the right of Lucius and the called wizard staggered into the middle of the circle prostrating himself. "Master I have not betrayed you," he babbled, but the Dark Lord needed no more than a simple _legilimens_ to get to the truth. An _imperius_ elicited a full confession and Voldemort turned once again to his lieutenant. "Lucius, take care of him," he commanded, and the blond wizard steeled himself to follow his master's orders.

He craved the power his position brought him among the Death Eaters, but it irked him that he had to buy it with these kinds of tasks. He started out with a simple _cruciatus_ that increased in intensity as he progressed. While he listened and watched, he felt nothing but disgust and weariness. A torturer's heart should be in his job, but he could not bring himself to feel sadistic pleasure at what he subjected his victim to. Bellings was neither a muggle nor a mudblood. Lucius had no quarrel with him. When Bellings had finally lost the ability to scream Lucius simply used an irreversible spell to excise the man's tongue for his betrayal, then stepped back.

He noted a sharp glance from the Dark Lord. "In a mellow mood tonight, my friend?" the oily hissing voice of Voldemort teased him, and he inwardly cursed himself. He had been perceived as weak. However, his master had other things in mind than to humiliate him. He took a swift step forward and now towered over the Death Eater lying on the ground at his feet. A softly hissed spell escaped his lipless snake-mouth and then, in a series of sickening wet tearing noises Bellings began to turn himself inside out while still alive.

While Lucius' spells had eventually left the traitor voiceless this new agony ripped sounds from him again, and even some of the seasoned Death Eaters recoiled in horror. Lucius heard some gagging noises as several people turned their backs on the circle, lifted their masks and tried to vomit inconspicuously into the bushes behind them. He continued watching in fascination, almost against his will, noticing that he took a detached, almost clinical interest in the nature of the secret spell that Voldemort had spoken and that he had not encountered before.

A pair of blue-grey eyes watched him intently from the slits of a black eye mask as he looked on. The woman who faced him across the clearing had not turned away either, but she disregarded the quivering heap of flesh and intestines that had once been Horace Bellings and instead observed Lucius with a hungry gleam in her eyes.

Finally with all signs of life vanished from the bloody mass at the center of the clearing the execution had come to an end, and Voldemort called his troops to order. "Before we leave I will give three of my trusted servants a list each of wizards and witches who have befouled our ranks by consorting with muggles and mudbloods. I leave it to you to take the appropriate steps to rid us of this abomination. At our next gathering I will await reports of your progress. Malfoy, Mulciber and Jugson to me. The rest of you is dismissed."

Lucius approached his master one more time, and kneeling before him received a small folded piece of parchment which he took with a deep bow and hid in his robes. Then he made his way across the clearing in preparation to leave and apparate at the Manor. He had just pulled a portkey from his pocket, when he felt a hand touch him on his shoulder. Immediately he turned, wand pulled half-way from his cane. Rivalries among Death Eaters were common and usually lethal. Only constant vigilance and aggression guaranteed survival.

* * *

_Her_

Black Manor, August 10th 1974

I am so angry, I can barely write right now. Lucius was at the house today to visit. Mother had told me beforehand that he would call, and this time I was much better prepared. I had put on the new leaf-green robes that Bella says work so well with my skin tone and eyes and I had left my hair all open with some spells for an extra sleek and shimmering look. I also used some calming spells so I wouldn't come over like some moonstruck idiot this time.

Mother had invited Lucius into the drawing room, and she had even left us alone for a few minutes! Despite what she told me about that marriage by age thing, I really think she approves of my interest and will help me. And why not? From what I have been able to find out, Lucius is pureblood and his family is wealthier than Midas. Actually we would do well out of a liaison by marriage to them. Lucius' sisters are married to a real Hungarian count and the richest European importer of magical items from Russia respectively.

Anyway, I am settled in with my wonderful wizard and we're just getting to talk. Everything seems to work really well. We are discussing Beauxbatons, I am not stammering once, and Lucius actually asks about my last few months at school and tells me about his time at Slytherin House at Hogwarts. He is so amusing, and I'm laughing, and he's smiling back, pleased he's entertaining me, and I'm in witch-heaven!

Just then Andy walks in!

In all fairness, I don't think she meant to, but she had to come barging in. She had her face stuck in some stock lists and two house elves with parcels in tow and she almost smacked right into us. Her hair stood up in a scraggly mess, and she was wearing that ratty, smelly old gown that she uses round the storage rooms when we're receiving a new shipment of herbs and potions ingredients. Hell, she had soot or dust or something in a big black splotch on her right cheek. She looked ridiculous.

And Lucius, MY Lucius, was on his feet in a flash, and he had turned deadly pale and he was stammering – stammering(!) her name. "An- Andromeda," he said, and it gave me goose-bumps just hearing him. I wish he would say Narcissa like that! She just barely looked up and gave him that stupid enigmatic smile-thingy she has going, and he looked completely dazed like she had just slapped him round the face a couple of times.

She stretched out her hand like it was nothing special and she didn't look like _Witch Weekly's_ worst dressed witch of the year and wished him a good morning. "Did you come to see me?" she asked totally matter of fact. And he looked like he had just seen a Veela and nodded, and I swear his voice was trembling a little when he answered her. "Yes, Andromeda, I came to see you." How stupid is that? Like she just spell-zapped his brain or something.

And what does she do, she makes that silly smile of hers grow even bigger and says: "Wonderful, Lucius, I am so happy to see you! We have just gotten a huge delivery of dried mandrake roots, civet and ambergris. Would you mind helping me with some of the quality checks? I'm run off my feet and father is at auction in London today. I need to pay the delivery people, but I'd like a second opinion as to whether the merchandise is really up to scratch."

She didn't even wait for his answer, but simply reached for his hand and he didn't look back once, didn't even take his leave of me, but walked out on me with her as if she had a damn leash around his neck. "Bye sis," she said, and then they were gone. Aaargh! I could scream! I could kill her. Now they're over in the stock rooms inspecting fucking mandrake roots, and he'll be calling her "Andromeda" in that voice of his, and she won't even care. She just saw I had something I wanted, and she takes it, like always. I hate her, I hate her, I hate her!!!

And he is falling for her stupid games. But I can't hate him! Oh Lucius, how can I warn you? How can I let you know? I need to owl Bella again. Dresses and hair spells are not enough ammunition against Andy. This time it's war, "sis"!


	4. The Ghost of a Memory

**The Ghost of a Memory**

_Him_

Blue-grey eyes regarded him with an amused glint as he swiveled round to confront whoever had dared to touch him. He heard a soft throaty laugh and then his companion lifted her mask. "Iocasta Mayfield," he said neutrally. She grinned. "Nice going tonight, Lucius," she teased him. "Losing your edge?" He compressed his lips. He would not take her bait in potential earshot of their master. "What do you want, Iocasta?"

She rubbed herself against him in a quick sensuous wriggle and long black hair spilled from the hood of her robes. "Why, you of course! I have been missing you. You never stop by and fuck me any more."

He stood close enough to catch the sharp smell of a recent sexual encounter on her. She'd had a man just before she'd come to the meeting and she hadn't even bothered to clean herself up. Lucius imagined that probably she wasn't even wearing anything underneath her Death Eater robes. He bent down, his voice no more than a heated hiss. "I don't think you've been starved of attention in the meantime," he sneered.

"Meaningless, only to slake the unquenchable thirst of your absence," she sighed with mock pathos, pressing against him. He knew the moves of her game only too well, yet his feelings of contempt at her crude approach began to mingle with genuine desire despite his better judgment.

The events of the last two days had left him feeling raw and vulnerable. He remembered Andromeda too vividly to be able to deal with this woman effectively, but then he looked again at the pale oval of her face, the deep wells of her eyes, her high-backed aquiline nose, and the full sensuous curve of her knowing mouth and he knew he would give in, as he had done before.

Her face had begun to show the first traces of her dissipated lifestyle and the color of her eyes tended towards a dark blue-grey, but otherwise Iocasta Mayfield could have passed for his former love's twin sister. That was what had drawn him to her to begin with. Of course he had never told her of his true motivation, but his and her needs and expectations had meshed well enough over the last few years to make them seek each other's company on occasion.

"Come on," she teased him now. "Be with me tonight, Lucius. Draco is well past the age for bedtime stories these days, and you have nothing else to go back to. And I can give you so much of what we both need."

He gripped her arm. "Don't speak the name of my son!" he threatened her, but she sighed in contentment at his display of force. "Oh yes, Lucius," she smiled. "You want to hurt me, to punish me. Wait till you see how bad I've been!"

They apparated together in the vaulted entrance hall of her luxurious London town home and she immediately turned on him and slashed at him with a hiss, her fingers curled like claws. She managed to rip two nails across his cheek before he could grasp and pin her wrists. He felt a sharp pain and the drip of warm blood where she had got him and threw her back against the wall with a growl of rage hearing a satisfying crack as her skull made impact with the dark wood paneling.

"You bastard, "she spat at him, fighting against his grip. "Who do you think you are? Not a word from you for three months! Do you think I'm your whore, your bitch, only to serve you when you want me?"

She tried to attack him again, but this time he was ready for her and lazily back-handed her across the face with enough force to throw her back into the wall. "I didn't know you thought of yourself as a woman who required payment, but I'm sure that can be arranged, my dear. Now, since you seem to have a clear appreciation of your role in our relationship I suggest, you get to it."

He grabbed a fistful of her hair and brought her face up to his. "Dare to break my skin one more time tonight and you will only barely live to regret it." Lucius smirked inwardly as Iocasta managed to lead him to her bedroom at a speed that clearly conveyed her eagerness while trying to make him believe at the same time he was dragging her there against her will. She was an inventive little slut and knew very well how to play him.

Still, as she threw open the French doors to her large bedchamber he barely managed to hide his shock. Spreadeagled and tied down on the bed lay a tall, muscular naked man who now looked up first in relief, then in some alarm at seeing not only Iocasta, but another male enter the room. He licked his lips. "I'm glad you're back," he called out to her. "You really need to untie me. I need to go to the bathroom in the worst way, Lisa."

At this point the blond wizard still reacted with a modicum of worldly composure, though he had to admit he found his companion's behavior to be in questionable taste. He raised an eyebrow. "Very untidy of you – Lisa – to leave your toys lying around like that… I believe I should report to our Lord what a faithful follower you are, dropping absolutely everything when he calls."

The witch seemed unfazed by the whole situation and smiled at him. "Lucius, may I introduce Mark Williams. I believe he works as a banker in the City of London, but I must confess that I do understand little of such muggle matters…"

At that point Lucius' jaw dropped in disbelief. The man bound before him, the man Iocasta had undoubtedly had sex with just before going to a Death Eater meeting was not a wizard at all. She had dared to stand before the Dark Lord with the seed of a muggle still fouling her body. He gasped in outrage and disgust.

Seemingly oblivious to his reaction his companion had turned to the man on the bed. "Mark, this is Lucius Malfoy, an old friend of mine. I thought he could join us, if you don't mind." Striking with the speed of a coiled snake Lucius grabbed Iocasta, pulling her round to face him. "You are out of your mind, witch!" he choked. "How dare you…" and for once in his life found he was lost for words. Still his seething rage screamed for release and he struck her across the face again, hard, meaning it this time, wishing for it to hurt, to knock some sense into her.

Lucius Malfoy was a powerful man. Iocasta was thrown from his grip and flung halfway across the room where she collapsed just before the bed. However, she recovered quickly and pushed herself up on her hands and knees. Blood dripped from her split lip. She shook her head to clear it, but she grinned and her eyes now gleamed with aroused excitement. "Oh Lucius, I knew I'd get you. You didn't believe me when I told you I'd been bad, did you?"

The blond wizard strode up to the bed ignoring her. His fury had not abated. He looked into the stupid, shocked eyes of the muggle, who now made the fatal mistake of threatening him. "You perverted bastard, how dare you hit her like that. I swear to you, as soon as she unties me, I'll fight you, I'll call the police on you! Who do you think you are? What kind of a sick game is this?" Lucius' face now held a positively feral expression. "You filth are in no position to speak to me like this. You ask me who I think I am? I'll tell you who I am: I am your worst nightmare!"

He looked around and found his glance arrested by a flat black leather case on the nightstand holding several small vicious-looking knives. He didn't even pause to wonder what Iocasta would be doing with those in her bedroom, but simply fixed his eyes on them raising magical energy and intoning: _"Inserto laminas!"_ A moment later the instruments blurred and vanished, and as Lucius now again concentrated on the muggle, the man before him suddenly howled in pain and convulsed straining against his bindings until his joints cracked.

The Death Eater noted vaguely that Iocasta had got back up from the floor and was standing next to him. She gave an amused chuckle as she witnessed her lover's death throes as he was slowly cut to pieces by the knives now magically embedded inside his stomach. "Oh Lucius, what a delightful idea," she crooned, blissfully unaware that the wizard's fury had by now reached boiling point.

He turned from his victim as blood began to pool on the man's lips and confronted her, his face white with rage. "You planned this!" he hissed at her. "You wanted me to see him, to know what you just did!" And suddenly he felt an almost physical reaction as his tenuously maintained control finally slipped. It seemed like a tearing sensation in his stomach, perhaps not unlike the one he had just produced in his muggle opponent. A red haze flowed through his mind eroding any pretense at conscious choice.

When he finally came to he found he had mounted Iocasta who now lay face-down pressed into the dead body of the muggle. Her fingers scrabbled at the covers as she feebly tried to fight him, but his hands were firmly closed around her neck cutting off her breath and he was fucking her with all the vicious intensity of which he found himself capable.

His only motivation was to punish her, to make her feel the agony, the heartbreak she had caused him. "Now you know what you did to me, you bitch," he grunted, accentuating every word with another powerful thrust, tearing into her. "Now you know how I suffered, what I have suffered since."

Suddenly he felt the woman beneath him arch up and realized through the fog of his furious confusion that she was actually climaxing. He moved off her in disgust at the discovery – it would take someone as crazy as Iocasta to show any positive reaction to this kind of treatment – but in his own state of arousal it took no more than the contact of his own strung-out body with the bed-sheets as he threw himself off her to set him off.

In helpless anger at his own weakness he felt his hips thrust into the mattress a few times out of their own volition as his instincts took over and he ruthlessly bit down on his lips to stifle any sound of pleasure as he spilled himself into the blankets.

A moment later the rage he had felt seemed to slowly drain from him, leaving him cold and hollow and strangely weightless. He heard a choking sound between a sob and a cry next to him. With a groan he lifted himself and saw that Iocasta had rolled off the corpse and onto her side. She was rubbing her neck and slowly and painfully curled up into a ball.

He looked down on her, shaking all over, and for a moment the woman staring back at him out of wide-open, shocked, red-rimmed eyes was not Iocasta Mayfield at all, but Andromeda herself. He neck showed the blackened bruises of his hands where he had almost choked her very life out of her. Her lips, split from his vicious blows, quivered in panicked disbelief that he could do something like this to her.

Reality blurred and he felt tears spring to his eyes. He stretched out a hand, loathing himself beyond his own capacity for disgust. "I'm, I'm sorry, my love. I never wanted to… I could not hurt you… I love you. Why did you do this to me? Gods, I love you!"

Then the embarrassment of his situation hit him full force and he recoiled, feeling sick to his stomach. The woman before him was nothing but a common whore who would even debase herself to having sex with a muggle just to bait him. He had given her exactly what she had wanted, what she had needed.

Losing his composure before her now had been an inexcusable weakness, and he hoped she was still too dazed from the violence of their encounter to remember his reaction and his words. He curled his lips in what he hoped was a convincing sneer and pulled the bedclothes over her. "Cover yourself, you filthy little bitch," he snarled, genuine anger at his own lapse coloring his words.

He tidied up his clothes and stalked over to where he saw his Death Eater robes in a pile on the floor. He picked them up trying to push down his overwhelming feelings of disgust at the whole situation. As his hands encountered the solid, heavy weight of his purse, his decision came to him quickly. She had made him weak, and his wish to punish her for it no longer had the make-believe quality of a game. He truly wanted to humiliate and hurt her now.

He grabbed a fistful of galleons and threw them over to her, the heavy gold coins bouncing on the silk blankets and slipping into her dark hair. "Here," he said. "I guess your muggle john couldn't pay you before I killed him and he won't be round to fuck you again either. Let me compensate you for your loss."

He watched her lift herself up from the mattress and for the first time he thought that she really looked nothing like Andromeda at all. Her face seemed suddenly ugly, twisted, worn-out and coarse. "You are one sick fuck, Lucius Malfoy," she croaked angrily. "What the hell is wrong with you?! I'm through with you, once and for all."

He straightened himself, tossing back his hair. "Good, Iocasta. I'm genuinely relieved to hear that. In the future, if you ever dare to proposition me again, I will wring your worthless neck in earnest, you filthy muggle-whore."

Lucius Malfoy apparated directly into the manor and spent the next hour scrubbing himself thoroughly in one of the guest bathrooms. He still felt a ghost of his former anger, but now it was solidly directed at himself, for having given in to Iocasta Mayfield's stupid games and for his inability to separate fantasy from reality as he had allowed her similarity to Andromeda Black to govern his actions.

He also had to admit that it sickened him to find that when it came down to it, he had wanted to do nothing more than rape and hurt the woman that he remembered once loving with every fiber of his being. As a Death Eater Lucius could easily recall many questionable deeds, but this realization made him sick to his stomach.

Sleep was out of the question, and he did not want to confront Narcissa even if he had been able to lie down and rest. So he walked over to his study, lit a lamp, picked up the small book with the silver unicorn and star on its cover and began to read.

_

* * *

_

_Her_

Black Manor, August 31st 1974

Finally, I have had some time to talk with Bella. I'm quite desperate now, as I think Lucius and Andy are shaping up to be an item. It's so frustrating! I try to be around when he comes to visit, and mother seems to help me by inviting him to have tea with us and then seating me next to him, but any chance he gets he's off with her, always under the pretense of helping her with father's business.

It's a stupid pretext, I think, and Bella agrees. She says she's seen the whole scenario before and she's sure there's something between them and that Lucius has fallen hard for my stupid bitch sister, who won't even make an effort to dress up for him. It's not fair. I saw him first. I'm so jealous I could blow up just thinking about them.

I told Bella I'd hex Andy, make her face erupt in pus-filled boils or give her a hunchback, use a spell to have her hair fall out or develop horrible stinky dragon-breath, but then she told me I'd be found out, father would be furious, Lucius would think I was childish and Andy could easily get rid of the curses. She's pretty good with magic, especially healing spells, because of all the herb-lore and potions she works with.

Anyway, Bella asked how serious I was about Lucius, and when I told her I'd marry him, actually that I would even secretly go all the way with him whether he married me or not, that I didn't care, she seemed to grow quite thoughtful. She asked me to tell her whether I loved him and I really choked up when I told her that I did. So she sat down with me and stroked me, and told me that I shouldn't stop hoping and that she would help me.

She said something strange, too. She said that as a family it would be very good for us to be related to the Malfoys. But she also said that father was still upset with her for eloping with Rodolphus, and that if I was taken care of as Lucius' wife and with the third out of the race, things would look much brighter.

I asked her what she meant, but she just laughed the way she does sometimes, and it scares you and excites you just a little bit, and said she was talking out of her ass, and I shouldn't pay any attention to her, but that she had a plan she needed to think on some more. She said she could probably make things better for all of us in the long run.

* * *

Black Manor, September 26th 1975

Well, summer's at and end and I'm actually busy with non-school work right now. I've got a junior position at the Ministry of Magic working at the Department of International Magical Cooperation. Some of the stuff I need to deal with is quite interesting, and it helps that I am fluent in French after my time at Beauxbatons, but I am angry that it keeps me away from home during the day.

Of course now when Lucius comes around I'm stuck in bloody London and he hangs out with Andy all the time. The other night Andy told father over dinner how she was planning to launch a new business venue with the Malfoys, and he was so approving of her plans, I wanted to throw my plate at her in frustration.

Not much in the way of news from Bella, but at least there is a little fly in the Andy-Lucius ointment now. His name is Ted Tonks, and he's a muggle! Andy first started to talk about him about two weeks ago. It seems that muggles have the equivalent of mediwizards, but they call them doctors. Well, this Ted is a muggle doctor. Andy says he specializes in "alternative medicine", whatever that is. I mean from what I know muggle medicine itself is pretty alternative already, what with their obsession with germs and cutting people up and all that.

Anyway, first time Andy talked about Ted in front of mother, mother told her pretty soon to shut up, and that she would not have a topic as rude as muggles discussed at home, which I think is only reasonable, but I was still able to find out that Andy met this Tonks guy at a herbology fair in Sussex. It's frequented by witches and wizards, who go scouting for new potions ingredients, but there are also muggle traders, and muggles come to buy herbs and tonics, too.

I pretended to be interested, and surprisingly she bought it, stupid as she is, and I got her to talk to me when mother was gone. Boy, she really lit up when she mentioned the guy. It was Ted-this and Ted-that, and generally the sun shines out of Ted's ass. I've never heard her speak of Lucius that way. Mind you, I could never bring myself to ask her as I would probably have scratched her eyes out, if she told me.

Anyway, Ted Tonks is an alternative doctor, and he works with a potions – well, she calls it medicine – research group in London who look at tinctures and plant extracts taken from South American jungle plants. Of course the traditional grimoires don't have anything on that, but she said Ted knew of a tree-sap that could cure skin breakouts and rashes, and of an orchid extract that could help with immune diseases, whatever that is. I guess the short of it means that she wants to work with him to find new ingredients for our magical supply trade.

I really think, though, she has a bit of a crush on that muggle doctor. If parents find out they'll go berserk. Blacks don't do muggles! Ever! After all we are not some sad mudblood, half-breed, village-witch family! Well, I guess Andy always went for brains over looks. Maybe things are going to look up a bit. Time to send Bella another owl!


	5. Family Feud

**Family Feud**

_Him _

Lucius lowered the diary into his lap and rubbed his bloodshot eyes with a sigh. Now at the height of summer a dim, pale dawn already hung over the garden and park and he felt overcome by an almost unbearable weariness and exhaustion. It had been a bad idea to dig around in old painful memories. Now the name of Ted Tonks stuck in his gut like a knife, and Narcissa's words slowly twisted and worked the blade. 'Bad comparison,' Lucius thought with a grimace, recalling the muggle he had killed only a few hours before.

He tried to get up, but reminiscences began to crowd in on him, and he let the slim book fall from his grip to the floor and closed his eyes, surrendering tiredly. Narcissa had been right in her suspicions. By the end of September, he had certainly made some progress in his relentless pursuit of Andromeda Black.

He actually liked that she largely seemed to disregard his charm, wit and appearance. Instead she related to him quite matter-of-factly as a young person who like herself was finding his way in business and in society and wanted to make a career. She would talk earnestly to him for hours, freely sharing her thoughts, her dreams and desires for life, and he had listened and soon responded in kind. He found that she had an intelligent, quick-witted and penetrating mind and that he began to trust her judgment.

It had seemed refreshing to be with her and away from the numerous society gatherings where the proud mothers and simpering daughters of the old families would fawn over him. Not that he was above taking advantage of his looks and position on occasion to treat himself to some nubile young witch, but over the weeks he found he began to think of Andromeda more as a friend and soul-mate than as an exciting sexual conquest.

Of course the physical tension he had felt in the beginning still remained, and the mere thought of her would get him aroused in a heartbeat, but he also found himself looking forward to talking to her as a sounding-board for his ideas. As the weeks passed he realized that he started to see her as a potential future partner, and he had even begun to share his plans for her with his parents.

His father had hesitated at first, as he was not impressed with the Black family's financial status, but he had to admit that the union would bring together two of the oldest and most prestigious magical houses in Britain.

His mother Livilla, a straight-backed, taciturn woman, had actually hugged him in an uncharacteristically effusive display of emotion when he had told her and assured him she was very happy for him. She had then proceeded to fuss around in the drawers of her drawing-room cabinet and had finally given him an intricate silver ring that showed two interlacing snakes balancing a huge star sapphire between their heads. It had been her own engagement ring that Octavian had given her many years before.

Lucius had felt a bit embarrassed at seeing his mother overcome by such an attack of nostalgia, but had been secretly pleased and grateful as he had pocketed the ring together with its small black velvet box. It would look stunning on Andromeda's elegant, slim-boned hand.

So far he had not breathed a word of his intentions to his prospective bride. The only indication of his love for her actually was his reluctance in pushing matters with her in the way he would with other girls. So far they had shared several breathless encounters in her family's labyrinthine storage facility for magical potions ingredients. None of them had progressed beyond some quite intense foreplay, however.

Lucius found that he considered it to be in bad style to deflower his future wife before their wedding, or at least until after their formal engagement. He had been surprised to see his parents' old-fashioned education having such a profound effect on him, particularly as he had absolutely no comparable qualms about saving himself in any way. He also had to admit that times had changed, and that he couldn't even be certain that Andromeda had not had other boys at school, but he felt unwilling to pursue those thoughts to any length. To imagine her with someone else seemed simply unthinkable.

The wizard's thoughts drifted off into reminiscences of the old musty herb-stuffed linen bales that had formed their love-nest on several occasions. When they moved against each other they heard the dry crinkle of crushed dried leaves beneath them and fumes of the fragrant oils of laurel or yarrow would rise around them. He still couldn't smell certain plants and resins without vivid flashbacks to their encounters. One time they had had the misfortune to have chosen a big sack of hellebore leaves as their bedding. They had both almost died of sneezing fits and laughter that afternoon.

Lucius lips curled in a faint smile as he remembered, then relaxed as sleep finally overtook him. He suddenly found himself alone and outside the Black warehouse at the edge of a dark forest that stretched as far as he could see. Grey, deep-hanging clouds shadowed everything and the air seemed chill. He pulled his cloak around him and ducked under the low branches of the first trees. He felt neither apprehension nor excitement, but simply an unshakable conviction that he would find something important, something of irrefutable truth in the depths of the woods.

His progress under the old trees was faster than he had anticipated and he strode forward without looking back. No sound could be heard save the footfall of his boots crushing leaves and branches underneath. Finally he reached a clearing that looked eerily familiar, and his dream-self recognized it as the place of the gathering of the Death Eaters earlier that evening. In the center of the clearing stood a tall, shrouded figure, facing away from him. Lucius immediately went down on his knees acknowledging his master. He heard a rustle as the Dark Lord moved, but the black wizard did not address him.

Finally Lucius looked up and recoiled in surprise as he saw his own face staring back at him from the shadows of Lord Voldemort's hooded robes. His opposite smiled at him, his red, slitted eyes glowing in malice, and his lips drew back from the snake fangs of his master. Lucius suddenly felt a deep sense of revulsion and menace. Then the strange hybrid creature before him began to speak in the hissing lisp of the Dark Lord.

"Listen Lucius, as I command you. One truth you must know that has been kept from you. Your wife Narcissa is a muggle. Your son Draco is a mudblood. The Death Eaters hold them now. And you will have the honor of killing them and ridding the wizarding world of the abomination of their existence. Only if you do as I say will I spare you, dishonored as you are because of your union."

There was movement at the edge of the clearing and black-robed figures dragged in the pale, bleeding, naked bodies of his wife and son. "No!" he shook his head in panicked disbelief. His every instinct as a father screamed at him to protect his child. And his wife, gods! She appeared cut and injured just like Cecilia Rookwood had looked when he had left her with Avery the other night. He felt bitter bile rise in the back of his throat as he prostrated himself before his master pleading for their lives, knowing that it would be to no avail, that he had instead sealed his own fate with his act of disobedience.

* * *

With a start Lucius suddenly awoke. He gasped, blinking in broad sunlight and sat bolt upright. "Merlin! Fuck!" He breathed hard, trying to collect himself. Then his eyes fell on the enchanted hour glass on his desk. It was almost 8:30, and after he had reamed out Draco for being late the other morning it would hardly send the right message if he missed breakfast himself now. Being a Death Eater, going on ill-conceived sadistic benders with slutty witches and bringing up children at the same time was a hard job to balance.

He didn't allow himself the luxury to process his nightmare and to pursue the disturbing thought that maybe he was developing something as inconvenient as a haunted conscience all of a sudden. Instead he de-wrinkled his robes with some spellwork and took a quick draught of pepper-up potion, then made his way to the dining room. He arrived just in time to see that Draco would be fashionably late yet again and to look into the accusing eyes of his wife.

Narcissa sat at the end of the table that faced the door and appeared as if she had not slept at all during the night. She did not talk to him as he curtly nodded to her and then silently took his seat. He waited for the house-elves to serve on him and casually began to read the paper.

About five minutes into the lead article he finally heard her. "Where the hell have you been all of last night?!" she hissed. Lucius lowered the paper. "I might ask you that. When I woke up yesterday morning you were most assuredly out of this world! Frankly, I meant to tell you that I was summoned before the Dark Lord yesterday evening, but I wasn't sure I'd find anybody in there who could even hear me." He tapped his temple for emphasis.

"So the meeting took all night? Why didn't you come back afterwards?" The blond wizard felt his temper slip. She hadn't even acknowledged yet that she had drugged herself again. "You know what? I'm sick of this!" he snapped. "Why don't you just take your pick, Narcissa? A: I came back, but slept in my study, because I am fed up with waking up next to a zombie. B: I didn't come back because I picked up one of the Death Eater witches after the meeting and for a change fucked someone who was actually awake enough to appreciate my efforts. C: I felt a bit tense so I hung around in London for a while and tortured a muggle to death for fun. D: All of the above."

Narcissa had blanched at his last words, but just as she opened her mouth for a reply Draco sped into the room, looking slightly rumpled, and suitably guilty. The rest of the breakfast conversation could be described as chilly, but civil. Afterwards Lucius needed to leave for several Ministry meetings, taking care not to give Narcissa another chance to catch him alone.

_

* * *

Her_

Black Manor, October 5th 1975

Bella has been home to visit and was very eager to hear everything about Ted Tonks. She seemed even happier than me about Andy's serious lapse in judgment. She thinks we can definitely turn things around and get Lucius interested in me. 

Of course we are all invited to the big Halloween ball at the Malfoys, and she thinks we should make our move beforehand. I tried to get her to tell me what our move was, but she wouldn't tell me any more. She just advised me to get as much face-time with Lucius as I could manage without seeming too eager or even becoming a nuisance.

I think with Lucius dragging off Andy any chance he gets to be alone with her discussing "business" and me being at the Ministry all day I can consider myself lucky if I get a glimpse of him at all… I wonder if they are doing it in secret.

If they did I'd be so mad! But Bella said that would actually be a good thing. She told me she's heard Lucius has quite a reputation and if he does Andy, she's no better to him than any of the other girls he's involved with. She is more worried about the fact that they might not be doing it. She thinks if he leaves her be, he respects her and he might plan to propose to her at the Halloween ball. Now I'm really worried. There's just a few weeks to go. And frankly I can't see how Bella plans to "turn" Lucius to want me.


	6. Narcissa's Secret

**Narcissa's Secret**

_Him_

Lucius apparated at the Ministry and spent the morning talking to Minister Fudge, attending several rather boring committee meetings and running a few secret errands for the Dark Lord and the Death Eaters. Normally these chores would have bored him, but the nightmare that had woken him earlier still bothered the wizard, and he was actually grateful for any distraction.

Still, at noon he had finished with his engagements and decided to spend some time in his office. He asked the young secretary the Ministry had assigned to him to bring him any messages and paperwork that had accumulated since his last visit and to organize him some lunch.

The young witch had sat her NEWTs at Hogwarts earlier in the year and was still nervous and pretty clueless in her first job. Lucius found her inexperience to be quite a vexation, as he had to explain every task to her in excruciating detail, and could still be reasonably certain she would manage to screw it up.

He tried to remind himself that she was a pureblood, that she was not a house-elf and that she was actually reasonably good-looking. It was the only strategy he could think of, that prevented him from hitting her over the head with his cane on some occasions. Now she nervously danced around his desk trying to set out his food while he was writing.

"For Merlin's sake, girl," he finally snapped at her. "Are you hell-bent on getting grease all over my parchments and the ink-well to fall over? Put the damn tray on the filing cabinet over there! What are they paying you for? Well? Answer me!" She looked up, tray in hand, her face beet-red, and Lucius noticed that she was trying to fight back tears. Good, perhaps he would finally get through to her.

"T-to be your s-s-secretary; to take care of you when you are at the office." Lucius suppressed a smirk. That could be interpreted several ways, some of them probably not intended by the Ministry employee, but perhaps worth exploring one of these days. Then again, if she gave head the way she usually sorted his files he might end up permanently incapacitated. He shuddered at the thought.

"Fine," he snarled. "Then concentrate on learning how to!" "B-b-but I'm trying Mr. Malfoy, I really am!" Oh gods, she was actually crying now. "Well, trying doesn't seem to be good enough, now, does it? Pay attention to what I'm saying. And if you do get it wrong the first time learn from your mistakes. Now stop sniveling, it doesn't impress me." She snuffled. "Yes sir, I'm sorry sir."

He regarded her for a moment, realizing that he felt actually disgusted at having yet another victim on his hands. "You know, here's a piece of advice for you. Live your life so you never have to say you are sorry. Even if you do things others think you should regret, they should be things you wanted to do, so you don't have to apologize. Stop running around in a daze, girl. Focus! Now get out of here. Your pitiful attempts at servility are nauseating!"

The witch stared at him in wide-eyed surprise, set out the tray where he had instructed her and ran from the room. Lucius sighed. "And shut the bloody door behind you!" he hollered after her. He rolled up his letter, decided to clear his papers out of the way himself, before another catastrophe could happen and settled down for a surprisingly good meal of horklump and kelpie casserole. With time to himself, he realized he started to think about his nightmare again.

On the surface the dream had simply been ridiculous. Of course Narcissa was not a muggle. She was the youngest daughter of Arcturus and Artemis Black, who had been as pureblood as anyone could wish for. Yet, the emotions he had felt at witnessing his family subjected to punishment had been disturbingly real.

Lucius was also troubled by the fact that he had appeared twice, as the Dark Lord, who had set the events in motion, and as himself, another victim who had condemned himself to death by protecting his wife and son instead of killing them.

Dream-interpretation was an important part of magical practice, and even though Lucius had never been much interested in it he knew enough to realize that he obviously had a problem on his hands. The question was which one. Did he secretly harbor sympathies for muggles? The mere thought made him snort in amusement. He hated muggles with every fiber of his being. He had killed many of them without giving it a second thought and certainly without remorse.

Did he sometimes wish he was the Dark Lord? Well, he needed no damn nightmares to know that and to dismiss it immediately for the ridiculous attack of megalomania that it was. While he was a powerful wizard, his abilities exponentiated by generations of breeding within the pure bloodlines, he could not possibly dream to rival or even challenge the might of his master, the heir of Salazar Slytherin himself.

On further reflection he decided that somehow in his dream he had substituted Narcissa for someone else. The woman he should have confronted was Andromeda, and while she was not a muggle herself she had married one. The part of him that had appeared as Voldemort had demanded she die for her transgression, the part of him that still loved her had pleaded for her life. He had wavered between those two reactions in reality. Part of him had reveled in hurting Andromeda's look-alike Iocasta, had even wanted to kill her, part of him had been appalled at his behavior and made the pathetic plea to her to forgive him.

Lucius was sure that reading Narcissa's diary had set his mind working on the events that had happened 20 years ago, and he was still curious how things had unfolded from the perspective of Andromeda's sister. His hand traveled to the side pocket of his robes where he had put the diary before he had left the manor in the morning. "Let's get this over with," he sighed. He pushed the tray aside and opened Narcissa's book.

_

* * *

Her _

Ministry of Magic, October 11th

Bella paid me a surprise visit at the Ministry at lunch time and she had a wizard in tow, a lanky, geeky guy with a seriously oversized nose, name of Severus Snape. He should really take better care of his hair. Anyway, Bella wouldn't talk at the office so we went to a small magical restaurant near Covent Garden that I know. They have a floating chocolate truffle dessert, which I absolutely love. You need at least two slimming spells after you've eaten it. Me and the other pureblood girls from the office hang out there all the time.

Once we had a table, Bella told me more. It seems this Snape guy is a total genius with potions. Bella says they work together. I didn't even know she had a job! Note to self: need to ask her about that when the whole Lucius thing is settled. We ordered food, and then Bella asked me in this perfectly nice conversational tone. "So little sister, are you still a virgin?"

I got such a shock, I almost spat butterbeer all over her. When I got past my surprise I gave her a kick on her shin under the table. Why would she be asking me such a personal question when this greasy git she had brought along was listening to us? Besides she knows I was never a slut at school like those mudbloods and now I'm saving myself for Lucius. I told her so the other day. But the guy just smirked.

"It's okay, Cissa, don't mind Severus. He's here to help us with regards to the Lucius problem. Severus, why don't you explain?" Severus looked at her, and then he said: "Narcissa, your sister tells me that you have set your eyes on the heir of Malfoy." I nodded. "Well, I happen to know Lucius. We were in Slytherin together, though not in the same year. Now apparently Lucius is after your sister. Bellatrix tells me they might get engaged at Halloween."

Oh boy, he shouldn't have said that. I felt that I couldn't have anything for lunch any more. Hearing a stranger say those words really bothered me. So I just nodded. I must have looked pretty miserable, because Bella reached over the table and stroked my arm.

The potions guy continued. "Well, I happen to know the recipe for a very powerful love philter that would turn all of that around. If you gave it to Lucius to drink with the intention that he should love you instead of your sister, he would be head-over-heels for you, and wouldn't even remember anyone else in a skirt existed." I just stared at the man wide-eyed. I think next to Lucius Severus is the most amazing, gorgeous wizard I have ever met. Yes, I think Severus is my new hero!

Still, I remembered Bella's question, so I asked. "So what's with the virgin stuff?" Bella answered me. "See, Cissa, Severus tells me, to make the potion, he needs the blood of a virgin." I grinned. "Well, then we're in luck. Actually when we go back to the office, I can go by the Department of Magical Accidents and Catastrophes. They have a mediwizard on staff, you know for when some of those muggles get accidentally blasted. He can draw some blood."

Now Severus looked at me with a really funny expression. "Ah – not that kind of blood," he said. I'm still not sure whether he was leering at me or being embarrassed or both. Anyway, Bella explained. "What Severus means is that he needs the blood that you bleed when you do it with a man for the first time." I guess I was really dense, because I said. "But, unless we give him the potion first, Lucius won't sleep with me…" Bella must think I have a mental deficiency or something. It was kind of embarrassing.

I think Severus was getting a bit uncomfortable by now and he elbowed Bella, so she sighed and told me: "Well, I guess we all need to make some small sacrifices for what we want. I'm afraid Lucius won't be your first. Severus here will." I almost choked on my butterbeer again. Must stop drinking when discussing matters of life and death!

I took a really good look at Bella's friend, and I think I was feeling faintly sick. I think Severus is not my hero any more. He isn't all that bad-looking, I guess, if you concentrate on his better assets. He has pretty eyes, really deep chocolate brown, and his mouth is kind of nice. I like his hands, too, slim and long and precise when he moves them. But he just has to do something about his hair! I was trying to imagine us doing it and I was still feeling sick. I want Lucius!

Bella gave me an encouraging grin. "See," she said. "Lucius never need know. There are spells to fake virginity. And anyway, I'm telling you, first time isn't that great to begin with, 'cause it hurts a bit. You should get it over with. That way you can really look forward to your wedding night, plus you won't act like a complete idiot, because you're clueless. I'm sure Lucius will appreciate it, if you have some idea what to do with him."

That made me a bit angry. "Just because I'm not a slut, doesn't mean I'm totally stupid!" I told Bella. She just smiled. "Okay, point taken, but I'm sure Severus here can still teach you a thing or two." That of course brought me back to my task in getting the potion brewed and I wasn't angry any more, but rather terrified. Anyway, I guess there's no way around it. I let Bella talk me into doing it with Severus.

So now I'm sitting at my desk here at the office, hoping my boss doesn't catch me writing down what happened. I am to meet Severus tomorrow at the _Leaky Cauldron _during my lunch break. Bella has booked a room for us. Gods, I really, really wish there was another way to get Lucius to fall in love with me.

* * *

Black Manor, October 12th 1975

Hecate be praised it's over and done with! Bella wasn't joking, it hurts like hell! I don't think I ever want to do it again, even with Lucius.

Okay, better start at the beginning. Bella met me at the office this morning. She had two bottles with her. One had some potion in it to make sure I wouldn't get pregnant, so I quickly drank all of that. It tasted really awful.

Then she had another bigger bottle that had a mix of firewhisky, a calming draught and some aphrodisiac in it. "That'll relax you and get you in the mood,' she said, clapping me on the back when I looked at her. "But you shouldn't go back to the office this afternoon. Your boss may think you're a bit off…" She was way too cheerful for my liking, but I guess she tried to help me keep my spirits up.

We apparated in Diagon Alley and because we had a little time to kill we sat in a quiet corner at the _Leaky Cauldron_ and Bella made me drink another firewhisky and gave me all sorts of advice, which I guess I didn't listen to much, because I was getting quite tipsy, and because I was still nervous as hell.

I think she told me to be nice to Severus, because he wouldn't charge for making the potion and if he was in a good mood he would help her at work, and I owed her because she was helping me. I believe she also told me to relax, that it would hurt less that way.

Well, finally Severus appeared, hair an awful mess like yesterday, but at least his robes didn't look like he'd slept in them, and he smelled nice this time. Bella just grinned and said. "Guess I'll leave you love-birds alone now. Cissa, be a brave girl. Severus, I'll be back in an hour to pick her up. You won't need longer will you?"

I remember the wizard clearing his throat and mumbling something, and then I was getting up, and the pub started spinning and I think I heard Bella curse. I had actually passed out.

When I came to I was flat on my back looking at a really cracked and dirty ceiling and just as I was beginning to wonder what was going on, Severus was bending over me with his greasy black hair hanging all around my face. We were both stark naked!

"There you are," he just said, and then he was kissing me. I guess I tried to cooperate, but I was still trying to figure out what was going on, and Severus came up for air and complained. "Oh for Merlin's sake, relax! You're stiffer than a plank. I think I liked you better when you were passed out."

I tried to remember what Bella had told me and concentrated. I had fooled around with Jacques de Navarre at school a couple of times, so I tried to think of that, and I guess it got better, because Severus stopped complaining and was kissing me more and I ran my hands over his back and he seemed to like that. We did that for a while and I thought things might not be so bad after all. He was really smelling nice.

But then he was pushing my legs apart and I was looking down and I saw what he was going to put inside of me and I remembered that Bella had told me it would bleed and I tried not to panic. Oh, I don't think I can write this! I guess I tried to talk him out of it, and he asked me whether I wanted my damn potion or not and got pretty cross with me.

So he ended up doing it anyway, and I tried to relax like Bella said to do, but it hurt really badly no matter what. Hecate, I think I'll spare myself and the paper having to go through all of that again.

So here's how things are. Severus has my blood. He soaked the tip of his handkerchief in it afterwards, but most of it made a splotch on the bed-sheets. I wonder if the landlord will bill Bella because we left such a mess. I'll have my potion in two days. He'll give it to Bella, so I don't have to meet him again, which is fine with me. Bella picked me up like she promised and took me straight home. She told mother she'd met me at lunch by accident and I had complained I was feeling a bit sick.

Mother bought the story. I guess I really don't look so perky. At least it's over and in two days Lucius will be mine. I must be stupid! I'm still in pain when I touch myself and here I'm already trying to get yet another guy to sleep with me.

Oh yes, one other thing: when Severus was naked I noticed he had the same skull and snake design on his arm as Bella and Rodolphus. But like Bella he wouldn't say what it was for. He said, though, if I really every wanted to find out what hurt, I should try and get one.

I asked him why he'd do it if it was painful and he gave me that really meaningful stare and said that some things were worth suffering for. I guess I was supposed to think that my pain was okay, too, for getting me the potion, but I still think he could have been a bit more gentle about it.


	7. The Truth

**The Truth**

_Him_

Lucius' hands trembled slightly as he closed the diary. He was so angry he barely stopped himself from hurling the book across the room. Professor Severus Snape had fucked his wife. In fact, had been the first ever to fuck his wife. He thought back to his wedding night. It seemed witches really knew how to fake virginity. He didn't think life held any surprises any more for him in that department, but he had to admit he had been wrong. "Live and learn," he muttered.

Unable to sit still any longer he got up and paced his office, indulging himself with fantasies of what he would like to do to the slimy potions master and to his wife who had dared to try and ensnare him by means of magic. No one ever compelled a Malfoy! The Dark Lord's inside-out spell from last night wouldn't be bad for starters for Severus. Of course it was most unlikely anything would come of it. Severus Snape was high enough in Voldemort's favor to be safe from attack for now.

That thought put a bit of a damper on Lucius' fury and he realized that something else was nagging him now. If Severus had mixed up a love potion so he would fall for Narcissa, when exactly was that supposed to have happened? The blond wizard had to admit that his marriage to his wife had resulted from a rather muddled mess of motivations, but sudden, inexplicable passion had never been part of it. Either Severus had mixed up an uncharacteristically ineffective philter, which seemed unlikely, judging from his usual mastery in the craft, or he was missing something else.

Despite his resistance he forced his memory back to the events that had broken off his plans for his engagement to Andromeda Black before he had even had a chance to ask her. It had been a cold, crisp October afternoon, only three or four days before Halloween. By now he could almost come and go as he pleased at the Black residence. He had been told the ward passwords and the house-elves had been instructed to recognize and obey him.

His pretext for visiting had been a rather obscure article in "Bewitching Botanicals" one of his agents had sent him about a fungus outbreak that was decimating _boswellia_ trees in India. Of course this meant that Andromeda should buy up all the frankincense she could lay her hands on, because next year's prices would be through the roof. He realized that an owl would have been sufficient to let her know, but he would hardly pass up an opportunity to see Andromeda in person.

As he apparated at the house he ran into a young woman who reminded him strongly of his lover, but while she possessed the same raven black hair, proud face and aristocratic grace as her sister, he realized soon that this had to be the oldest Black daughter, whom he had not met before. He'd heard she'd been headstrong enough to marry one of the Lestrange boys against her parents' wish.

She seemed unsurprised to see him, smiled at him and introduced herself. "I'm Bellatrix," she said. "Bella to my friends. You must be Lucius, and if I'm not mistaken, you're after my sister, Andromeda." Lucius had taken a step back at her words. "I assure you, Miss Black, my intentions with regards to your sister…"

She had given him a throaty laugh that had been far from innocent, and he had noted quite a calculating look in her dark eyes as she had interrupted him. "Please, Lucius, why so formal. We'll be family soon, won't we? Please forgive the unfortunate figure of speech. Of course I mean that you are here to _see_ my sister." Lucius had been very sure that had not been what she'd meant, and it vexed him that she already had him pegged with regards to his intentions to marry Andromeda.

She appeared to be well aware that she was provoking him, and she seemed to enjoy toying with him. Lucius, who valued poise and control above everything else felt annoyed at being caught off his feet, and had to admit to a grudging admiration for his opponent. He knew Bellatrix was about two years his senior, but her powers and strength could have belonged to a much older and more experienced witch.

The oldest Black girl had cast one last appraising glance at him, and he still could not be sure, but he thought her eyes had softened somewhat as she regarded him. Then again, the hallway was dark, and he thought he was mistaken. "Andromeda is over in the south wing, in the small office where we keep the stock lists. You will be able to catch her there." He had thanked her and quickly left, eager to see his prospective bride.

Well, Bellatrix' words had proved prophetic. Catching Andromeda had been exactly what he'd done. As he had knocked and almost immediately opened the door, impatient at sharing his news with her he'd found the love of his life stretched out on an ottoman by the window, clothes half undone, and passionately kissing a tall man with short-cropped, dark-brown hair who had his hand stuck up her robes.

Andromeda didn't even have the good grace to break apart from her companion as he had called out her name in shocked disbelief. She had merely sat up and looked at him out of mauve-grey eyes that seemed drugged with passion – she had never looked at him like this before – and asked: "Lucius, what are you doing, coming barging in here like that?"

He had not been thinking clearly at that point. Rage, wounded pride and genuine anguish had clouded his judgment. He had pulled his wand from his robes and made ready to challenge his rival, do duel the wizard who had dared come between him and his prize.

To his utter amazement the young man who had faced him had looked at his challenge with stupid incomprehension in his eyes, and Andromeda had actually got up and stood before him. "Leave him be, Lucius. He can't fight you." He hadn't understood. "What kind of a coward are you giving preference here? I am calling him out like a man. Let him defend himself."

Andromeda had merely spread out her arms in a gesture of protection, and her next words had shattered his world. "Lucius, I'm begging you, for the love I have for this man, spare him. You are a powerful wizard, and he is a muggle. He cannot fight you. But if you want to punish him nonetheless, you'll have to go through me, I swear." She could have blasted him with a _cruciatus_, and the effects would have been similar.

He had lowered his wand and sunk to his knees. "Andromeda, this isn't true," he had begged her, trying to deny what he had just heard. "Please tell me this isn't happening." She had looked at him, and he saw sorrow in her eyes for a moment. "It is, Lucius, I am sorry. This is Ted Tonks, and I love him."

At that point his ancient Malfoy pride had asserted himself and he had got back on his feet as fast as if the floor under his knees was on fire. He was the heir of the House of Malfoy, he had no business kneeling to a mere Black who had dared to spit in his face and give some filthy muggle preference over him. Who did this woman think she was?

At that moment he had felt a great, cold hatred settle on him like an icy chill that curdled his blood in every vein of his body. It had never left him since that day. "If you think you deserve no better than that, you are welcome to it," he hissed at her.

Andromeda must have read his change of mood in his face. She suddenly looked frightened. "Lucius, please, try to understand, I…" He interrupted her. "I don't need to understand. Your behavior is an outrage to everything your family believes in. How dare you disgrace them by consorting with a muggle under their very roof? Your father will hear of this. You disgust me!" He had spat on the floor before her feet, gathered his robes and walked from the room.

Outside he had inexplicably run into Bellatrix again, but had not bothered to answer her curious questions and had made his way directly to Arcturus Black's study. He then proceeded to interrupt a business meeting, insisted that Mr. Black dismiss his associates so they would not be privy to the shameful news and had told him what he had just witnessed.

When Mr. Black had returned with him to the office, the two culprits had disappeared, however. Perhaps Andromeda had been wise enough to anticipate that her new lover would not be spared by the fury of her father.

An hour or so later and at the insistence of Bellatrix Lucius had been included in an impromptu family emergency meeting. He had been asked to relate his story and had witnessed the formal exclusion of Andromeda from the house of Black. Her name was struck from the family tree and Mr. Black had told them that she would be disinherited and he didn't wish her name to be spoken in his presence ever again.

Lucius had approved wholeheartedly. His father would have done the same thing, if he or any of his sisters had dared to dishonor their pure bloodline in this manner. Fueled by his own anger and disappointment he had felt a grim satisfaction at Andromeda's punishment.

After the family meeting, Lucius had spent a little while with the two remaining sisters and had found himself comforting the youngest Miss Black, who appeared rather shaken by the events. It was really then that he had noticed Narcissa for the first time. While bearing some resemblance to her sisters she also seemed very unlike them. The stark beauty of the older two girls was transmuted to a light prettiness in her that pleased the eye. Her hair showed a rich honey blonde and the deep mauve of her sisters' eyes was faded to a pale lavender in hers.

Her looks had put Lucius in a thoughtful mood. She reminded him of Andromeda enough to rouse his interest, yet she was different enough to make him think he could eventually forget his former love. Rumors about an alliance between the houses of Malfoy and Black had already been whispered at society events, and Narcissa might just prove to be a convenient solution to avoiding embarrassment for all concerned.

The very next day Lucius had had a conversation with Mr. Black, and at Halloween he had formally proposed to Narcissa, who had accepted his proposal with almost unbecoming exuberance. Lucius had still felt hurt and angry at Andromeda's betrayal, but he also felt a grim satisfaction that her outrageous behavior hadn't even put the smallest of dents in his plans and timetable.

About a week or so after the ball Bellatrix had paid Lucius a visit, and after some polite pleasantries she had turned the conversation to muggles. Of course this was a topic that now possessed quite a sting for Lucius and he had responded with some vehemence.

As many other pureblood families, the Malfoys simply regarded muggles as being below contempt. Most self-respecting wizards and witches in their social circle pretended they didn't even exist, and tried to avoid contact even with their mudblood offspring as far as possible. Old Mr. and Mrs. Malfoy would have simply turned the conversation to another topic in distaste, but Lucius found he now wanted to talk about muggles, and there was venom in his words.

Bellatrix listened with interest and sympathy, encouraging him and assenting passionately when he maintained that muggles were nothing but a blight on society and should be eradicated. Eventually she had looked at him with an appraising air.

"You know, Lucius, you'd be surprised how many witches and wizards at our age feel the same way. We think the politics of appeasement that the generation currently in power has pursued are dangerous and may ultimately undermine wizarding society. Active intervention is necessary to save us from this muggle filth. Actually, Lucius, have you heard at all of someone called Lord Voldemort? I think he'd be someone you'd be most interested to meet."

And so a few days later Lucius had participated in his first Death Eater gathering. Before Yule, before his wedding to Narcissa, he had accepted the Dark Lord's mark of fealty and had been sworn in as a loyal follower. Bellatrix had sponsored his acceptance, and her status in the service of their master had increased accordingly.

He still recalled the heady sense of power and purpose that had come with his new secret allegiance, not to mention his introduction to black art practices that elevated his mastery even over the most able of pureblood wizards. Every raid, every order of murder and destruction had allowed him to live out his hatred, and every muggle that went down before him, eyes wide in agony and disbelief had born the face of Ted Tonks.

His memories had calmed him somewhat, and Lucius slowly settled himself down again and reopened the diary.

* * *

_Her_

Black Manor, October 15th

Bella came by this evening. We had to sit through a rather boring family dinner first which turned rather unpleasant, because Mother wanted to know if Bella was pregnant yet, and when my sister said she wasn't planning on having children any time soon, that she had better things to do, parents started to lecture her on her responsibilities. She doesn't like being told what to do, of course, never has, and let them know what she thought of their "meddling". Things didn't improve much after that.

So I was really relieved when we were finally able to get away and hole up in my room. Bella pulled out a small red glass vial "With compliments from Severus. He wants to know how you're doing." I told her she could tell that guy any old story about me she wanted, and that I wasn't planning on him and me being friends or anything. Bella thought that was funny. She laughed and then she was sitting there, looking at the little red bottle in her hand with a rather thoughtful expression.

Well, by now I was pretty eager to get my hands on the means of ensnaring my man, after all I'd paid dearly for it, but when I asked her to hand me the potion, she gave me this long appraising stare and said. "Listen to me, little sister. I have a better idea what we should be doing with this stuff. There'll be advantages for both of us in this, if we arrange things right."

She then started to explain to me that she was planning on giving the philter not to Lucius, but to Andromeda. "Are you crazy?" I shouted at her. "What do you want Andy in love with Lucius for?! I didn't do this for her!" Bella just shushed me, which I hate, but I really wanted to find out what this moronic plan was about, so I finally forced myself to calm down.

My sister gave me this really evil smile and explained. "Cissa, we won't make Andy fall in love with Lucius. We'll make her go crazy for the muggle she's dragged up at that fair that you told me about. She'll tell Lucius what to go and do with himself, and you'll be there to comfort him. And if that isn't enough, we can save a bit of the potion and give it to him to turn him if we have to."

I wasn't really convinced. "Bella, that's evil. Father was this close to disinheriting you for marrying Rodolphus – and he is pureblood. If Andy runs around with a muggle, he'll kick her out for sure. Look I hate her at times, but I wouldn't want that to happen to her."

Bella interrupted me. She grabbed my robes and got really close to make her point. She scared me. "I do, Cissa. You're right: I got this close to being disinherited. And I want my share of the family fortune. With Andy out of the picture there's more for you and me when the time comes. Plus, you'll be a Malfoy, you'll have more money than you'll know what to do with anyway. You owe me!"

I could only stare at my sister. At that moment I thought I didn't know her at all. But she started reminding me how Andy had always been Father's darling, how she had made life miserable for me and even taken Lucius away from me (which wasn't exactly true) and how we both hated her. So in the end Bella left – with the love potion. I let her have it partly, because I wanted to believe her, and partly because I am now a little bit scared of her. If she can plan to have her own sister thrown out, she could do all sorts of stuff to me, too, if she got upset with me.

I'm not feeling too happy about things, though. I guess I just have to keep telling myself that Lucius will be mine soon, and that she'll even give him some of the potion if he doesn't come round. Actually if he comes to love me for myself instead of magical interference, that would be quite nice. With the potion, I'd never know if it was him caring for me or whether it was just Severus' brewing skills.


	8. Plans for Andromeda

**Plans for Andromeda**

_Him _

Lucius Malfoy stared at the slim book in his hands in shocked disbelief. When he had surprised Andromeda with Ted Tonks, Andromeda had been bewitched! Her own sister had forced her to debase herself in this manner. Bellatrix had taken his love from him, and for what? To increase her share of the family fortune, something that had never materialized for her, as a few years later she had been imprisoned in Azkaban.

The blond wizard found it hard to breathe. His marriage to Narcissa, Andromeda's expulsion – none of that needed to have happened! Out of this whole sordid deal no one had got what they wanted. Andromeda was chained to a muggle, cursed by the enchantment of a love philter, forced into a life of deprivation and disgrace. He had hated her for years for something she had had no power over. Lucius was certain beyond a doubt that she would have chosen him had she been free.

As for his part he was married to a woman who at best evoked lust and a measure of sympathy in him, and who at worst made him hate her for her weakness. He knew that to a certain extent he had always resented and despised her for being merely his second choice, his fall-back strategy. He remembered his advice to his secretary and snorted in self-loathing. He couldn't even live up to his own credo himself.

Lucius somehow doubted that Narcissa had achieved her ambition either. Why would she regularly drug herself, if she was happy, if being with him was her true wish? She had to miss something, too, something that her drugs provided, something that hurt so much that only that opiates took the edge off the pain. Severus' involvement in the whole affair paled in comparison to Bellatrix' interference.

Bellatrix had sacrificed her middle sister without a second thought to her own greed; and she had callously sold her youngest sister's virginity to further her own selfish plans. She had used Lucius' own hatred of muggles – incited by losing Andromeda to Ted – to bring him under the sway of the Dark Lord and thus ingratiated herself with her master.

Lucius usually had no problem with selfishness, not in himself and not in others. It commanded his respect; but he would not tolerate being duped in this manner. He had to admit that Bellatrix' plan had been flawless, until he had discovered the diary. She had made her move and had been found out. Now she would have to deal with the repercussions. She deserved death for her interference. Azkaban protected Bellatrix for now. But Lucius swore to himself that he would ask the Dark Lord's permission to be avenged upon her.

Lord Voldemort – the blond wizard suddenly felt as if he should remember something. He placed the diary on a side table and suddenly jumped to his feet when he recalled the last Death Eater meeting.

Iocasta had distracted him and he had forgotten, but the Dark Lord had set him a task, and it would not do to show less than enthusiastic support. If he had no progress to report at the next meeting he would be in trouble, and he could forget any hopes to have his wishes with respect to his revenge granted. Paper crinkled in his breast pocket as he moved his hands over his robes and he pulled the Dark Lord's list from the heavy cloth of his elegant greatcoat.

Here were the wizards and witches his master wanted to be killed; and his pale eyes scanned the sharp, precise writing. "Stella Mugwort (witch), Robert Myers (muggle husband), three mudblood children. Albertus Mercator (wizard), Denise French (muggle wife), one mudblood child." The Dark Lord had even been gracious enough to supply the addresses. This should be easy.

Lucius read on and suddenly felt his blood turn to ice: "Andromeda Black (witch), Ted Tonks (muggle husband), one mudblood child (auror)." "Merlin!" he gasped. Here he had been carrying his former lover's death sentence in his breast pocket for almost a day. Bellatrix had not only destroyed his life, she had also sealed her sister's fate and condemned him to be her executioner.

His mind raced. He was right back in last night's nightmare which had now turned out to be rather prophetic. The choice he had dreamt about lay clear before him: to become the merciless right hand of his master and kill the one he loved, or to be the pitiful fool groveling at his master's feet and plead for her life.

Lucius had always been on the side of strength. At home he had been deferred to as the heir of Malfoy, the only male descendant of his family. Parents, siblings and servants had fawned over him.

At Slytherin he had been a natural leader, his command unchallenged from the first day. He never had to rely on brute force. A raised eyebrow could cow his classmates and commanded unquestioning respect. Of course for those whom this subtlety escaped there were always the capable and eager fists of Crabbe and Goyle.

After that he had run his father's business with harsh efficiency and discipline. One did not get fired from the service of the Malfoys, one got retired, with the funeral generously paid for by the Malfoy estate, of course. Everybody knew that and behaved accordingly. As a Death Eater Lucius had risen to be the Dark Lord's second in command, feared and respected by all the other Death Eaters.

Thinking back he had to admit that the only person who had ever been able to effectively cross him had been Bellatrix Lestrange. – Well, one could ignore for now that little snot Potter, who had cost him one of his house elves, and Dumbledore who had managed to remove him from the board of governors of Hogwarts. He was not finished with those two by a long shot, and there would be the day they would come to regret ever having stood in his path.

Now, however, he found himself faced with a genuine choice that could cost him his supremacy. If he elected to save Andromeda, he would lose the support of his master – he would most likely lose his life. He thought back to Bellings' execution the night before and shuddered. He would also break the habit of a lifetime and betray everything he professed to believe in over something as despicable as romantic nostalgia.

If he killed Andromeda, however, he would not follow his will. He would merely fulfill Bellatrix' plans and deprive himself of any chance to ever win Andromeda back. For every potion, every poison there was an antidote. She might yet be cured from her obsession with her muggle husband.

Lucius knew that pleading with Voldemort would be out of the question. He was a selfless, benevolent, reasonable and forgiving man in comparison with his master. But would he be able to help Andromeda and avoid detection? What amount of subtlety could protect one from a powerful _legilimens_ such as the Dark Lord?

The blond wizard decided to make a head-start with his other assignments while he considered his options with regards to Andromeda and after a brief consideration owled two of his fellow Death Eaters. Avery and Rookwood could spy out their victims, and with some additional help they could take both families out later that evening. With two thirds of their list eliminated, he was sure he could take a day or two to plan for the third strike.

He wanted to find out if the diary would tell him anything else about the potion and how it had been administered. Any information and leverage that would further his plans should help at this point. Lucius settled down again and picked up Narcissa's book. What had started as a curious and slightly tormenting diversion had moved into the realm of serious and desperate research.

* * *

_Her _

Black Manor, October 27th 1975

Merlin, what a day! Bella's plan has played itself out, and she has really achieved all she wanted. I didn't actually witness the big blow-up, but as far as I've been able to put things together Lucius came by the house this morning – to talk to Andy, of course. Bella waylaid him and purposely sent him to the south wing office where she knew Andy was hiding with Ted.

Ever since Bella gave her the philter three days ago, Andy has been acting like one possessed. She can't get enough of that muggle doctor and spends every free second with him. Bella has invited herself for a few days under the pretext that Rodolphus is away on business and that she would be bored at home. She said she saw Andy sneak Ted into her bedroom yesterday night, but she told me not to breathe a word of it. She had planned on Lucius finding out rather than Father or Mother.

Well, find out he did. He went straight to Father telling him. Bella came over to my room to let me know. She was shaking with laughter as she talked about it. She had hidden in the south wing corridor and had seen everything. Then she had followed Lucius to Father's rooms. When she had told me everything, she left again, but asked me to stay put.

An hour or so later we were all called to a family meeting – including Lucius! I was surprised to see him. He looked really awful, and I actually felt sorry for him. It seems to have been a terrible blow to him. He was very pale and didn't say much, but when Father pointed his wand at the family tree and made Andy's name vanish he sighed and nodded.

I felt horrible. I knew why Andy had got thrown out. And I am to blame! I let Bella do it. Father finally left and as Mother followed him to talk to him, Bella suddenly prodded me. "Come on, sis," she said. "I need some tears here. Trust me, just start sniveling. Only try not to look ugly while doing it." I turned to her, but she just pinched me really hard, so I actually had tears stinging my eyes whether I wanted to or not.

Before I could swat her back she had got out of the way and was speaking quietly to Lucius, who was staring blankly at the gap in the family tree where Andy's name used to be. A few moments later Lucius came over to me and bowed. I sniffed a little, feeling foolish, but he looked at me quite thoughtfully and sat down right next to me, much closer than he had ever done. He took my hand in his and started speaking to me, while his long fingers caressed my palm. I don't think he realized he was doing it.

"Don't you waste one precious tear on her, Narcissa," he said. "She doesn't deserve any of your pity. She had the best upbringing and the brightest future any young witch could hope for, and she threw it all away, betraying and defying every one in this world who loved her and cared about her. She left you too, Narcissa, and all over this filthy muggle."

Now my bad conscience was kicking in full force, and I needed no abuse from Bella to really switch on the waterworks. I turned to Lucius and hid my face in his robes so he wouldn't see how ashamed I was and started sobbing in earnest. I could feel him stiffen for a moment, like he was worried I'd mess up his robes (which I did, he was wearing a beautiful dark blue silk waistcoat, and I got the front if it all mottled with tears), but then he put his arms around me, and a few moments later he was really holding me to him, rocking me gently and telling me in his soft, gravelly voice not to cry, that everything would be all right.

And next thing I know, his words and hands really started to soothe me. I was smelling his cologne – which I really like by the way, bet it's expensive – and feeling his chest rise and fall with his breath under my face. It was so delicious, I just couldn't feel remorseful any more, hell, I couldn't even feel angry at Bella any more. Her brilliant plan made it all happen.

Here is was in the arms of the man of my dreams, and he was holding me to him, whispering sweet words of comfort to me without any damn potion whatsoever. He did it, because he wanted to, because of me, because he cares about me.

I guess he finally realized I wasn't bawling up a storm any more, so he let me go, which I didn't like much. It was so nice to hide in his scent and his clothes and feel him like that, but as I looked up at him he was holding a silk handkerchief and he gently dabbed at the tears on my cheeks. "There," he said, trying to smile, though in all fairness it didn't work so well and looked more like a painful cringe. "Someone as pretty as you shouldn't mar her beauty with tears, Narcissa."

I closed my eyes as he wiped the wetness from my face. "All better?" he asked kindly, and I nodded. "You are so considerate, Lucius," I managed to squeeze out. "Thank you so much for comforting me." I hoped it was the right thing to say and caught an encouraging smirk from Bella who was standing behind Lucius and was observing everything with great interest. "I, I am sorry Andy did this to you." That was a lie, of course.

But Lucius nodded and his eyes lost their focus on me for a moment. "You lost a family member today, poor Narcissa. I just lost a dream that was really never more than a delusion." Then he looked back at me, and I could have sworn he was sort of appraising me. "I believe we can be some comfort to each other, if you wish."

Bella lifted a warning eyebrow as I was getting ready to assure Lucius of how I wanted nothing more than that, so I scaled it back a bit and just swallowed my enthusiasm. "Shared grief diminishes," I said quietly, and Lucius briefly squeezed my arms in his hands, then got up, took his leave of me and excused himself.

"I'll walk you out," said Bella. "I cannot tell you how much we all appreciate your support in this terrible crisis. Our family can count itself blessed for a friend like yourself… " She continued talking to him as they walked out.

I realized I was still holding Lucius' handkerchief, which he had left with me. I could smell his cologne when I held it to my face, and I found I was trembling all over. It had all been just so much. I felt I didn't want to be around anyone just then and snuck off to my room to calm down.

* * *

Black Manor, November 2nd 1975

I have finally got some time to myself and the calm to write a little. So much has happened since Andy got expelled from home! Big news of course is that Lucius and I are engaged. We will be married at Yule. I never really wanted a winter wedding, because you can't wear pretty summer robes, but now I'm just so happy I get to be Mrs. Malfoy, I really don't care.

Next week Mother and I are going to Paris to have my gown fitted by the best magical robe tailor there is. Father says he will at least have one decent marriage in the family. And he is giving Mother complete control of the finances. I am in heaven! I can ask for anything I want!

But I'm getting ahead of myself here. First off I was surprised so see Lucius pay a visit to us again the very next day after the Tonks disaster, as Mother calls it now. I really thought with Andy gone he would have little reason or wish to see us. But he took time to talk to Mother and Bella, and he really made a point to sit and speak with me.

Like the day before he was very friendly to me, when before he couldn't get a way from me quick enough to be with Andy. He asked how I felt, and he had brought me some confections for a present. He said his mother swore they would help her get over any kind of unpleasantness. I tried them and they were very, very good. Seemed like Lucius felt he needed some comfort as well, so between us we quickly dispatched the sweets and talked about all sorts of things.

At first it was a little awkward, because neither of us wanted to mention Andy, but then Lucius asked me about my work at the Ministry and it got easier. I was just so happy he started taking an interest in me. He also complimented me on how pretty I looked and that I surely would be a sensible girl who would make her parents proud and do the right thing for her family. Of course I completely agreed with him.

Later he went and talked with Father as well, and at noon Bella burst into my room with the incredible news. Of course, while I had been hiding, she had gone sneaking after Lucius and eavesdropping. Apparently there is a room above Father's office, and if you hide in the fireplace you can hear all the conversations from below. It doesn't surprise me Bella found out about that. She had heard Lucius ask Father whether it would be acceptable to the family if he asked for my hand in marriage during the Halloween ball.

Bella said Father was a little surprised at first, but of course didn't want to mention Andy. So Lucius told him that any recent problems shouldn't disrupt a very profitable alliance between the houses of Malfoy and Black and that if he, Lucius, as the wronged party, could look beyond the present to the future benefits, then surely so could the Black head of household. So Father had agreed.

Bella spun me around and laughed. "Little sister, you've done it. Lucius asked to be handfasted to you, without any help of any potion whatsoever! You were great yesterday. You caught him when he was vulnerable and you turned him around. You are a witch I'm proud of!" She kissed me enthusiastically and it almost felt like old times – almost. If only I could forget what we did to Andy.

I was excited about the news of course and Bella and I talked about the ball, what we would wear, and making plans, but one thing just wouldn't leave me alone and I finally had to ask her about Andy. "Listen Bella: does Andy have to stay with this horrid muggle forever now, because of Severus' potion? Or can he give her something, maybe after my wedding, when I have Lucius, to make her stop loving Ted?"

At that point Bella got up and made me get up, too. She unbuttoned the sleeve of her robes and showed me the strange mark on her arm. When she spoke I knew she was dead serious.

"Little sister, pay attention! Do you see this mark? It is the mark of the greatest wizard who ever lived, maybe greater even than the great Salazar Slytherin himself. He did me and Rodolphus the honor to accept us as his followers and disciples. It is my greatest ambition that one day you will join him, too.

But as long as you are weak like that, a slave to the phony conventions of pity that society imposes on you, you never can. Don't be a victim. Be ruthless in asserting your needs and in getting what you want. Don't waste your energy on your enemies. Love those who love you and hate and destroy those who oppose you. Do you think Lucius will respect you when you are weak? He knows what it is like to follow your will. As his wife and as my sister you must, too.

This is what I will do to test you resolve." She reached into her robes and gave me the bottle with the rest of the potion. "Severus told me about this philter: 'One draught to bind in love, another to break the fetters.' I put this into your keeping. Give in to your weakness, find Andy and give her the second draught to lift the enchantment, or prove yourself to me, now! What kind of a witch will you be?"

She stared at me intently, and suddenly I knew I wanted nothing more than to make her proud and to earn Lucius' respect. I took the bottle and smashed it. It broke into a thousand pieces on the flagstones of the floor and I watched the few drops of liquid that would have saved Andy seep away into the cracks among the broken red glass. Bella gave me a big grin and slapped me on the shoulder. "Knew you had the guts, girl," she said. I couldn't say anything.


	9. Antidote

**Antidote**

_Him_

Lucius closed the diary without reading the rest of the entry. "One draught to bind in love, another to break the fetters," he murmured. Andromeda could have been saved, and Narcissa had chosen not to. No wonder she poisoned herself by degrees and hid in drugged sleep.

Of course Cecilia Rookwood's fate would upset her. She had pictured Andromeda in her friend's stead. It had not been her will to abandon her sister. Narcissa had been weak all her life. First she had been a puppet on Bellatrix' strings, and later a boring and pliant wife to himself. He felt as much disgust at the web of deception that had ensnared him as he did at her indecision and suggestibility.

"Another to break the fetters," he said again and slammed his hand on his desk in sudden inspiration. The door to his office opened, and his secretary cautiously poked her head around. "Anything the matter Mr. Malfoy?" she asked timidly. He looked up shaking his head. "No," he snarled, annoyed at the interruption. "But while you're here, take the tray out, and make sure I'm not disturbed. Now leave!"

If he gave Andromeda the potion now, she would finally see Ted Tonks for what he was. Unblinded by her fake passion she would recognize the terrible mistake she had made. She would recoil in horror at the misalliance and turn back to him, the man she had truly loved. Perhaps she could even be induced to remedy her mistake by taking care of her husband herself.

Once he could present the Dark Lord with a report of how he had lifted an enchantment off a pureblood witch who had then redeemed herself by killing her muggle consort, his master might exercise mercy. It would be a powerful signal to other pureblood witches and wizards who now feared for their lives in the wake of all the raids. Some of them might also decide to exterminate their families to save themselves. His solution could actually win him favors with Lord Voldemort.

The thought energized him and he decided that the first thing he needed in order to put his plan in motion was some of the old love philter. And of course who else to go to than to his fellow Death Eater Severus Snape who had been responsible for this mess to begin with. Perhaps Lucius could induce him to help him by promising to spare his life. Severus had to see that would be an act of quite uncharacteristic mercy, now that Lucius knew what exactly had happened during the autumn of 1975.

With the first step of his plans standing clearly before him, Lucius felt he had not a moment to spare. He slipped into his long, fur lined outer robes, grabbed his gloves, his cane and the diary and strode out of his office, barely acknowledging his secretary and telling her he was leaving for the day.

Outside the Ministry he spoke a quick apparition spell that put him near the forbidden forest at Hogwarts and made his way towards the castle. Lucius knew that since the debacle regarding Dumbledore's suspension and Tom Riddle's diary the he was not exactly welcome at the school any more. Of course as a parent his visits were tolerated, but he preferred to make this particular excursion a secret.

Now at the height of summer there was little danger of being spotted by students, because everybody had left for the holidays. And as an old Slytherin Lucius knew a few secret ways into his old school. At dusk he had slipped past a secret portal at the base of the castle wall near the dungeons and softly walked down a deserted corridor that led to Professor Snape's private quarters. Light shimmered from underneath a low, squat door at the end of the passage, indicating that the potions master was home.

Lucius quietly opened the heavy oak door and pulled back the hood on his cloak. He looked around to get his bearings and felt overwhelmed by the sheer number of objects that surrounded him. The walls were lined with shelves stocked to the ceiling with bottles, flasks, jars, bundles, boxes, herbal presses, and tins. Tables groaned under the weight of cauldrons, spell books and trunks filled with nameless shriveled animal and plant parts.

The whole place was suffused in the smell of musk, sulfur, storax, asafetida, henbane and ingredients that the blond wizard could not even name. The combined effect nearly sent him gagging. Gingerly he breathed through his half-open mouth.

Finally he made out a human figure sitting at a desk in the clutter and the half-light. "Severus," he choked. The Hogwarts potions teacher carefully placed a finger under the text passage he had been studying in a large grimoire before looking up. Annoyance at the interruption showed clearly on his narrow, saturnine face. "Lucius, what brings you here?" he asked curtly.

"This!" The blond wizard stepped up to the potions master and slammed the diary on top of the grimoire, sending a small dust-cloud up in the air. The diary was spread open on the pages that described the events of October 12th 1975. Snape sneezed and thought to protest at the rudeness of the gesture, but then his eyes caught on the text and he grew still and rigid as he read. Lucius black-gloved hand held the diary open for him and finally the potions master looked up.

"You're mad, because of the deal I made with Narcissa 20 years ago," he said. "Come on, Lucius, I always took your for a man of the world. Did you really think in our times girls still saved their virginity for marriage?" Lucius removed and closed the diary. "No Severus, you don't even begin to understand. Frankly, after what I know now, I wouldn't care if you'd fucked Narcissa's brains out. In fact," he added bitterly. "I wish you had and then had damn well married her into the bargain."

Snape stared back at his acquaintance of many years in shock. An outburst like this was rare from a man as coldly controlled as the head of house of the Malfoys. "What?" he asked, uncomprehendingly. Lucius brought his face close to his, his voice nothing more than a snake hiss of hatred. "You made her a love potion. You made her and Bellatrix a love potion and those two bitches took it and broke my heart."

Snape pushed back from the desk and out of reach of his visitor. "What are you talking about?" he asked. "Narcissa was crazy about you while you wouldn't give her the time of day. So Bellatrix asked me to make her a potion that she could give you to make you fall in love with her little sister. Hell, we were all in with the Death Eaters. I owed her one, so I mixed her up a bottle. Big deal. You got a good marriage out of it, and a decent son and heir. I hear, you still sleep around regardless. So what's the problem?"

He stood up and began pacing, speaking now with some vehemence born from resentment. "Why are you so high and mighty about a bad decision Narcissa made before she was even married. I know you're not above knocking a good-looking pureblood witch off your bed even now, and that's way after your handfasting."

Lucius didn't even take the bait. He turned away and Snape almost missed the next words. "Bellatrix and Narcissa didn't give me the potion. They gave the potion to Andromeda, who was the one I wanted, and made her fall in love with a fucking muggle! The Blacks disinherited her and threw her out on the street, and now she is on Voldemort's black list slated for execution."

The potions master stopped in mid-stride. "The whole Tonks fiasco? That was my potion? Merlin's balls, I had no idea!" He sat down heavily behind his desk again and ran his long hands through his hair. "Gods, Lucius, I'm sorry."

The blond wizard turned back, leaning over the table top. "You have to make me more to use as an antidote. I need to undo this! Look, if a muggle or mudblood will do, I'll get you another virgin, whatever you need. If you want to redeem your sorry ass for what you did to me, you better help me now, or Voldemort will find out your part in this, that you were using potions to force the abomination of a mingled marriage on a pureblood witch. I'm sure he'll be delighted!"

Snape stared back at his visitor who had pretty much threatened him with the equivalent of a slow and agonizing death. His lips twitched in displeasure. "Look, Lucius, quit the threats. I'm not impressed and I will make up my mind whether to help you or not regardless. And no, I don't need a virgin." For a moment he lowered his eyes. "Actually I never did," he admitted. Lucius straightened. "What? Why the hell did you tell Narcissa…?"

The potions master sighed. "Look at me, Lucius. You just have to stand there, lifting an eyebrow and you have witches wetting their knickers over you. Do you think I'm that lucky? I was twenty years younger, of less sound judgment and I wanted to get laid, okay? I'm sorry I ended up doing your prospective wife. Matter of fact, it wasn't exactly spectacular, if that makes you feel any better."

The blond wizard turned away. "Just shut up, Severus! You lied to Narcissa just so you could get into her pants, and now you have the gall to tell me my wife was a lousy lay. So how exactly do you think this is going to make me feel better?" He tossed back his cloak. "Just mix me up the antidote, and I'll get out of your hair about this. If you weren't a fellow Death Eater and if I didn't need you, you'd be dead by now, you little meddlesome, sniveling sod."

Snape's dark eyes briefly flared up in anger. 'Snivellus' had been the Potter gang's nickname for him, and the memory still stung. Lucius had worked with admirable thoroughness to eradicate any spark of sympathy his fellow Slytherin had felt for him when he had spoken about Andromeda. "Just come back tomorrow," said the potions master coldly. "I will have what you need." Lucius Malfoy pulled his hood forward over his face and walked out of Snape's private quarters without another word.

_

* * *

Her_

Malfoy Manor, December 26th 2004

Well, it's all over and done with. I am now officially Mrs. Narcissa Malfoy of Malfoy Manor. Actually I'm still having a hard time getting used to my new name. I'm having a hard time getting used to quite a few things, if I'm honest with myself.

The handfasting two days ago was absolutely stunning. My parents really went above and beyond to give at least one of their daughters away in style. I had the most gorgeous dress you could imagine. We had 250 guests and a most fabulous meal and entertainment. Celia, Denise, Monique and Bella were my bridesmaids. I was surprised that Lucius had chosen Rodolphus as best man, but from what Bella told me Lucius is now also a follower of this great wizard who gave her the mark, and she and Rodolphus advocated his admission and vouched for him. So they are all best friends now.

The ceremony was very solemn and dignified, but when I had asked Lucius whether we wanted to write our own oaths to each other, he had declined, saying that the traditional bonds should be good enough for us. I was a bit disappointed about that. Actually Lucius seemed kind of absent-minded most of the time. This was supposed to be the most important day of our lives, and he appeared somewhat bored by the whole thing. Of course he was really gracious and polite to my parents and to the other guests, and he danced with me when we were supposed to, but he didn't talk much with me. I almost felt like I had done something to upset or displease him, but for the life of me I can't think what it was.

When the celebrations were over, I said good-bye to father and mother and to Bella and my friends who stayed over at Black Manor. It was really nice to talk to my old classmates, actually. I hadn't seen them for a while and they made me laugh and kept my spirits up during the handfasting. It was just like old times at school. Then I apparated with Lucius and his parents at Malfoy Manor.

Old Mr. and Mrs. Malfoy welcomed me officially to their family and their home and then they left Lucius and me alone. I felt really nervous and unhappy by now. It had been hard to say good-bye to everyone and I would have liked to take more time, but Lucius had seemed so impatient, and he had talked to me less and less during the celebration.

Now he led me down a maze of corridors in the old family residence and finally pointed to a heavy door at the end of a long hallway. "Your rooms," he said curtly as he opened it for me. "My servants will collect all of your possessions tomorrow and bring them here. For now I have arranged for a few clothes and toiletries for you. If you are displeased with the furnishing or layout, we can make changes. As this is our wedding-night I will spend it with you here."

Gods, apart from the last sentence, he might have talked like that to a visiting great-aunt while showing her her rooms! The rest of the night continued like that. I had somehow hoped for passion and romance and love and – oh Hecate, I don't know – but it really reminded me of my encounter with Severus, minus the dingy surroundings, the firewhisky and the bad hair. Actually firewhisky would have been an improvement.

Well, I used the virginity spellwork Bellatrix taught me, and Lucius was considerate enough to ask me whether I hurt, but otherwise it just felt like going through the motions. He did try to relax me a little, I think, but by then I was so tense and unhappy, he gave up pretty soon. Honestly, I was relieved when it was all over and hoped I could just go to sleep in his arms and tell myself that I was only tired and exhausted, that I was really happy and that I was simply imagining things. But when he had finished Lucius got up and put his robes on.

I just stared at him in disbelief, too upset to ask him where he was going. He looked down at me once and said. "Your obvious inexperience excuses you for now, but if we plan to repeat these encounters until my family has an heir, you will have a lot to learn. I will see you for breakfast tomorrow. A house elf will wake you." With that he left.

I just cried myself to sleep after that. He really doesn't care for me at all. I think I have made a terrible mistake. And now I can't undo it. I wish I had someone to talk to, I wish Bella was here. Malfoy Manor is big, and ancient and dreary. Old Mr. Malfoy is wrapped up in his studies, I think he isn't even aware I'm there, and Lucius' mother seems very formal and strict. Every time she looks at me I feel like she disapproves of something. I would never dare to talk to her about her son and ask her what I could do to make him like me, and how be a good wife to him.

I want to go home…


	10. Three Assignments

**Three Assignments**

_Him_

As planned, Lucius met with Crabbe and Rookwood in a small wood near the beautiful old market town of Saffron Walden in Essex. It was already approaching dusk and it seemed that the two Death Eaters had been waiting for a while. Alvin Rookwood sat on a low tree stump, his shoulders hunched, and tossed acorns at a tree in front of him. Vincent Crabbe was causing a ruckus somewhere off to the side apparently caught up in some brambles, to judge by his choice use of swearwords.

Lucius called to them and saw Rookwood get up and approach him wearily. He obviously hadn't quite got over the assassination of his sister yet. Crabbe seemed to be able to free himself with a tearing noise of his robes and came stumbling over to them after a few moments. His Death Eater cloak showed a large rip.

"Ever heard of using magic instead of brute force," sneered the blond wizard. Crabbe merely grunted. Neither of the two men dared to criticize their leader for making them wait.

"So what do we have?" asked Lucius briskly. The sooner he got his chores out of the way the sooner he had time to concentrate on Andromeda. He patted the pocket of his coat where he could feel the slight bulge made by the slim red glass vial he had picked up from Severus Snape earlier that afternoon. It had been the cause of his delay.

Rookwood dug in his robes and produced a large roll of paper which he opened awkwardly. Lucius watched in curious amusement and lit his wand to help. He saw that his associate held a map – a muggle map apparently. A gaudy panel of magenta read 'Ordnance Survey.' The rest of the paper was pockmarked with abstract symbols for roads and little houses. Lucius shook his head. "What in the blazes do you want with that?" he asked.

"W-well, we needed to find the Mercator house for our surveillance," stammered Rookwood. "So?!" Crabbe decided to come to the rescue of his colleague. "Well, these are really useful. We found a whole lot during one of our recent raids. We thought…"

"You thought!" Lucius guffawed. "Vincent, you actually manage to amuse me tonight, very refreshing sense of humor." He turned back to Rookwood. "Pack that rubbish away, or even better, get rid of it." He flicked his wand at the map, which immediately caught on fire, so that the wizard dropped it with a soft cry of dismay. It flared up on the ground and dissolved in a pile of white ash.

"Now, let's do this properly," Lucius declared. "I assume the whole miserable family is home?" The two Death Eaters nodded. "In that case: _invenio casam Mercatoris_," Lucius pointed his wand, which immediately began twitching in his fingers like a dowsing rod and pointed them deeper into the wood. "Muggle maps," he sneered. "It is a sorry day for our master, now that his servants apparently need a muggle map to find their own asses. Be grateful I am not reporting you."

The two men hung their heads and followed the blond wizard's lead across some railway tracks and down a deserted unpaved farm road until they came to a small stone cottage surrounded by a large meadow with apple trees. The house seemed peaceful enough and felt quite magical nestled in its little orchard dell. One of the windows glowed with a soft golden light.

Lucius approached cautiously and finally stopped his companions to carefully hide them all with a few spells. Albertus Mercator was a wizard, after all, and might have taken precautions to protect his family. He motioned for the two Death Eaters to wait for his signal and then crept closer to the house.

Soon he felt the gossamer resistance of a ward and took his time to disable it with the care and concentration that would have done a muggle bomb expert proud. After all, Voldemort had not chosen him as chief Death Eater for his fashion sense. With the warning spells disabled, Lucius waved to his companions to join him. He flattened himself against the rough masonry of the wall next to the lit window and carefully peered around to catch a glimpse of the inhabitants.

The Mercators were sitting around the dinner table. Lucius caught a brief impression of a dark-haired man with a cropped beard, a short, squat woman in a flowery dress and a girl of about 15 in ugly, functional muggle clothes. He quickly pulled back and addressed the other Death Eaters. "We'll attack through the window," he instructed them. "There are three people, we use three spells. I will curse the man on the left, Rookwood, you take the woman in the center. Crabbe, you have the girl to the right. Think you can handle that?"

"What are we cursing them with," asked Crabbe excitedly. "No fancy stuff. A simple _avada_ will suffice. The Dark Lord wants them dead, no confessions, no information. Just take them out, quick and effective." Lucius heard the Death Eater sigh with disappointment and immediately jabbed him under the chin with the silver handle of his cane. He wanted no delays just to satisfy the sadistic whims of his underlings.

"_Avada_, Vincent!" he hissed. "If I find you messing around, you will wish you had never met me. Do I make myself clear?" "What's wrong?" protested Crabbe. "No one has ever had a problem if we had ourselves a bit of fun with the muggles." Lucius brought his face close to his for emphasis, and the heavy-set man took an alarmed step back, as he caught the glint of fury in the blond wizard's eyes.

"I have no time tonight for your antics! If you have too much pent up energy, go kick your house elves around for an hour when you get home. But you will not interfere with my plans. Now are we understood? Are we ready?!" Both Death Eaters nodded, and a moment later Lucius had unsheathed his wand again and blasted the window.

Before the Mercators could even jump up from their meal in surprise, three wands pointed into the room, three flashes of green fire were released from their tips, and without a sound Albertus and his wife sank to the ground. Their daughter screamed and tried to bolt while Crabbe's killing curse caused a cupboard behind her to explode.

Lucius groaned in exasperation. The man was an incompetent fool. Quickly he whipped his wand around and hit the girl squarely in the back with a second _avada_. She fell before she could reach the door.

The blond wizard cuffed his companion around the head. "If I wasn't in a hurry tonight, I'd _crucio_ you, you fool! How often have I told you: take aim, point your wand, then speak? One of these days you'll hit one of us!" Crabbe mumbled an apology, scrambling to get out of the way before his leader revised his decision not to torture him.

Lucius peered into the window one more time and with a quick flick of his wrist vanished the three corpses and the shards of glass and window frame that littered the floor. He straightened his robes, sheathed his wand and turned back to his companions, his face calm and devoid of emotion. No one would have believed he had just commanded the extermination of three human beings.

"Our next assignment is in Skipton, West Yorkshire. Rookwood, what can you tell me about the Myers family?" As Rookwood began his report the blond wizard strode back into the protection of the wood, his companions breathlessly following him and struggling to keep up with his pace.

* * *

The clock on the old belfry struck ten when Lucius finally apparated by himself on the small village green of Rottingdean. He had dismissed the other Death Eaters after they had finished their second job. Rookwood had been in bad shape and would probably need to go to St. Mungo's to get himself fixed up. 

The assignment had been unpleasant. The family had been scattered throughout the house, and by the time they had finished with the muggle husband and the older two children, the mother, who was a witch, had tried to flee through the garden with the youngest child in her arms, a white-blond boy. It hadn't exactly helped that the young mudblood had reminded Lucius somewhat of Draco at the same age. Though he would never admit it, he didn't particularly like killing children, even if they were less than pureblood. On the whole it seemed rather unsporting.

They had followed the witch and had eventually cornered her. The woman had some skills and had managed to take out Rookwood during a brief confrontation behind the house. Left with the questionable abilities of Crabbe at his disposal and several lights coming up in neighboring houses Lucius had quickly petrified the woman and child so they couldn't cry for help and had to drag the bodies back into the house before employing the killing curse. The green fire of the spell would have betrayed them outside.

Eventually they had finished mopping up after a raid that had nearly turned into a failure. Lucius had made sure they bodies of their victims hadn't left any traces and then had abandoned Rookwood in the care of Crabbe, who looked overtaxed and unhappy with his latest task. It couldn't be helped. The evening was wearing on, and the blond wizard was impatient now to visit Andromeda and try Snape's elixir on her.

He looked around the square to get his bearings and quickly strode across the green. The dim glare of a streetlight showed him the street name he knew from the Dark Lord's list and he walked on as he silently counted out the house numbers. A muggle who was walking a dog gave him a doubtful, sidelong glance shaking his head at the long billowing black robes and the blond hair gathered by an elegant velvet bow. Lucius didn't even pause to take notice of him, much less obliviate him.

Number 35 was part of a row of terraced houses set a little back from the pavement atop a steep ascending front garden. The Tonks had planted lavender and sagebrush among honey-colored boulders. Lucius could smell the faint fragrance of the herbs above the sea air that blew in from the beach. He made his way up the steps that led to the front door and hesitated before he rang the bell.

A polished brass plate by the door bore an inscription in plain Roman letters. "Ted Tonks M.D. and Andromeda Tonks. Holistic Medicine. Consultations by appointment." "Andromeda Tonks," he mumbled, feeling hot anger welling up inside him. "Not for much longer!" His earlier trepidation had disappeared. With a resolute punch he hit the bell button, gripping his cane with his other hand. He listened to the unpleasant, shrill noise of a muggle doorbell and then discerned a quick footfall. A shadow passed behind the dimly illuminated glass panes of the entrance and he found he held his breath as the front door opened.

A tall, slender woman appeared outlined before soft golden light that streamed out of the hallway behind her. She wore bottle-green slacks and a fitted white cotton shirt. Her thick, glossy, raven-black hair was pulled back into a pony-tail revealing a striking face with high cheekbones, a smooth forehead over arched brows and full expressive lips. Dark almond-shaped eyes regarded him intently, then he heard a soft crash to the side as the woman dropped a beaker with some cloudy liquid she had been holding and gasped his name. "Lucius, it's you!"

He stepped up to her. "Andromeda," he said. Warmth spread from his stomach down to his groin and up his throat. It felt so palpable he thought he might glow in the dark. She looked just like he remembered her, and despite the hurt and humiliation, he realized she still made him feel as she had when he had first seen her.

But the woman before him now barred his way. Her hands had gripped the wooden door frame, her chin jutted out at him defiantly. "I know what you are, Lucius. My daughter told me. You shall not come into this house. I will have nothing to do with you."

He stared at her uncomprehending. "What are you talking about, Andromeda? I am here to tell you about Bellatrix, and what she did to you." The woman regarded him. "Bellatrix? My sister? But you are a Death Eater! You are here to kill us." He sighed in annoyance. "Yes, yes," he admitted impatiently, "But not you, and not tonight. Now will you let me in and listen to me? I won't hurt you."

Andromeda looked at him for a moment, the same transfixing glance she had possessed as a girl, then she slowly lowered her hands from the door frame. "Come in," she said quietly. "Don't step on the glass." She closed the door behind him and as he turned he saw her pull a slender polished wand from the waistband of her pants and vanish the shards of the shattered beaker from the hallway tiles.

Now confronting him in the light she looked at him, appraising him. "My god, you guys really dress the part," she said shaking her head. "I had forgotten how pompous wizard clothes were. Anyway, I'm rambling. Come on in." She led him down the hallway and into a large cluttered kitchen that seemed to Lucius to be as close as a muggle could get to having an alchemist's workshop. She took his outer robes from him, pulled out a chair and invited him to sit.

"There's a teapot, a creamer and some mugs on the rack by the sink, help yourself." She bundled the robes over her arm and left the kitchen. Lucius looked around and noticed a second tea mug already half filled sitting on the table opposite him. It had to belong to Andromeda. She would be more amenable to his story if she had been cured of her infatuation with that muggle already. On impulse Lucius pulled out a slim red glass vial from his coat and hurriedly decanted about half its contents into his former lover's tea.

When Andromeda came back he was busy pouring himself a cup of tea. "Here," he said, pushing the other mug towards her. "I've given you a top-up, too." Andromeda regarded him critically as she slowly and reluctantly sat down. While he bore some resemblance to the young man she'd known, she also noticed changes about him. He still carried himself with pride, but what she had once taken to be youthful invincibility had matured into cold-blooded arrogance.

He had grown out his hair even longer and it now flowed halfway down his back, still full and impressive and now held back by an 18th century cloak-and-dagger velvet bow. His clothes just astonished her. She had lived among muggles so long, wizarding robes now seemed ridiculously old-fashioned to her. But despite the brocade, velvet and lace, the man before her looked nothing if not uncomfortably virile and threatening. There had only been one time before where she had felt him exude menace in that way – when he had caught her and Ted and had challenged her husband to a wizarding duel.

She picked up her tea mug and took a tentative sip. "So what do you want, Lucius?" she asked trying to sound more self-assured than she felt. "Are you alone?" he asked and she felt her muscles tense. She could lie, telling him that Ted and Tonks were around – and probably be found out in one second flat, after all it just took one location spell, or she could tell the truth. "I'm by myself," she said slowly. "Ted is on an emergency house-call to Telscombe. Nymphadora is in London."

He stretched his long legs under the table. Obviously he meant to take his time. "Nymphadora?" he asked. She squared her shoulders defensively. "My daughter," she said curtly. His lips twitched as if in pain. "A mudblood, bearing the name of her famed pureblood Black grandmother, how inappropriate." Andromeda sat up straight. "If you think you can insult me and my child in my own home, you are mistaken," she said, her own Black sense of pride asserting itself.

Lucius' mouth arched in a pained smile. "How could this happen? How could you betray your family like that? How could you betray us?" Andromeda took another sip of tea to buy time. "Lucius, this is ancient history. This happened about twenty years ago. Why come to see me now and talk about things only half remembered?" He looked at her out of clouded grey eyes. "Half-remembered," he mused. "The memory has been as a knife in my heart for twenty years. I don't half-remember." He gently laid Narcissa's diary on the table and watched Andromeda.

The woman before him stretched out a tentative hand to touch the tooled leather of the book and suddenly it seemed as if the planes of her face rearranged themselves. She blinked rapidly, her lips tightened and for all he knew she reminded Lucius of someone who was just awaking from a deep trance or dream. Surely Severus' potion was working.

* * *

_Her_

Malfoy Manor, January 20th 1976

I've just overheard a fight between Bella and Lucius. She's come to visit for a few days, and I'm glad I have someone to talk to.

On the whole I'm not quite as depressed as I was after my wedding. Obviously Lucius was right to say that I had a lot to learn. And as these things are not something you pick up on your own or that a decent husband would allow another man to teach you, Lucius had to concern himself with me if I was to make progress. So he has, and it's been certainly interesting, occasionally even quite enjoyable. He still won't stay with me the whole night, though I get him more exhausted these days, and that's still disappointing.

But as I am able to please him better, I feel more relaxed and he takes greater care to please me back in return. He's actually encouraged me to tell him what I like – though I find that rather difficult, particularly to put things in words, and he still gets impatient at times. If mother knew what we were doing, just like the other night when – but no, I'm even too ashamed to write about it.

Anyway, Bella was talking to Lucius in the drawing room, and they both thought I had gone out for a walk round the park with old Mr. Malfoy, as I have started to do, because he feels cooped up at times, but Mrs. Livilla won't accompany him in winter due to her weak lungs. However, he insisted the house elves had stolen his boots, which is rather ridiculous, but we really couldn't find them. So we gave up on the whole plan.

I got back and behind the door Bella was screaming at Lucius: "You know what he'll do when he finds out you're deliberately withholding her from him?" Lucius sounded just as angry. "I'm not withholding anything, Bellatrix, by Merlin, do you even know your sister? She would be nothing but an embarrassment and a hindrance. Her spell work is shoddy and her strength of will highly dubious. I so much as frown at her and she starts sobbing already. It drives me nuts!

The only thing I will still trust her with is to give me an heir, as I have not seen her mess that up yet. And I am very sure I do not want a pregnant wife of mine jeopardize her pregnancy by cavorting around with a bunch of Death Eaters." Bella snorted and started to reply, but Lucius' voice got really harsh and snide.

"Oh yes, of course you have gallantly refused to bear any children to your husband at all for the time being, so you can be a Death Eater. I don't know how the Lestranges feel about your deplorable lack of investment in your female duties. I for one know I wouldn't stand for it. My first duty is to my family and my house, and that means continuing the line."

I heard his steps traverse the room and his voice dropped. "Presume to interfere with that, and you will truly get to know me. You will not like what you find, Bellatrix. Now this discussion is closed, once and for all."

I was afraid they might find me overhearing their conversation, so I quickly left. I wonder what they were discussing, and what are Death Eaters? Perhaps the mysterious 'he' is the wizard who gave them all the mark of the skull and snake. I don't like that Lucius said my spell work is shoddy. And of course I get upset when he is upset with me. Why would that annoy him? I don't like Bella and Lucius fighting.


	11. True Love

**True Love**

_Him_

Andromeda began to realize that her guest was watching her intently now. It made her uncomfortable. "What?" she asked, annoyance showing in her voice as she opened the book Lucius had placed before her. "Am I sporting horns? Spinach caught in my teeth?" Lucius seemed at a loss at her questions. He cleared his throat. "How do you feel?" he finally asked, looking slightly nervous himself now.

She shook her head. "How do I feel?" She considered for a moment, then spoke with some vehemence. "Here I have a piece of my rather unpleasant past walking into my door. I know for a fact from my daughter, who is an auror, that you are what's called a Death Eater, that you serve the most evil wizard that ever lived, that this wizard has recently returned from the dead and that you are out with your friends every night killing muggles and the wizards and witches who live with them. Your promise that you are not going to hurt me isn't exactly reassuring in comparison. How do you think I feel?"

Lucius raked his hand through his hair dislocating some strands from his precise coiffure. "Can't you get past that for a moment?" he asked testily. "I told you I was not going to kill you." Andromeda took yet another sip of tea. "Yeah, what about Ted?" she replied. "He might be back any minute. Are you going to kill him? You sure wanted to once, and you weren't even a Death Eater then, or were you?"

That was not the question the blond wizard had expected. He was shocked to find that she still seemed to show concern for her muggle consort. For a moment he considered telling her the truth, that he would like nothing more than seeing the piece of filth who had dared lay his dirty hands on his woman writhe at his feet in agony, but he realized that it might actually upset her. And he certainly didn't want that. Maybe the potion needed a little time to work, or maybe Severus was a stupid quack and he would have to kill him after all. Maybe he hadn't put enough of the philter into her tea.

"Fine, I won't kill him either," he growled. She looked at him, mauve eyes scanning his face. His stomach lurched at the intensity of her gaze. He imagined sweeping the distillation equipment and boxes of dried herbs off her large kitchen table and throwing her on top of it instead. He would rip those demeaning and unflattering muggle clothes off her and would finally take what by rights should have been his so many years ago. However he again suspected she would take a rather dim view of that also. He began to realize he hadn't really thought his whole visit through very well.

Eventually he decided he would let Andromeda discover the truth for herself. Perhaps the potion would kick in while she was reading. With a nod he indicated the diary that lay open under her fingers. "I believe you want to start reading that at the entry of October 15th 1975," he said quietly. She tried to appraise his expression, but found he gave her nothing. "Read," he repeated, with some vehemence.

She lowered her gaze to the book, and Lucius felt relief to be free of her scrutiny for the moment. She did not trust him, and what she knew of him through her daughter made her fear him. As the mother of a mudblood she had every reason to. And yet he was sitting here with her, intent on having her learn the truth, and on having her return to him instead of following his master's orders. This disobedience could cost him his life. Was she worth it?

With her attention occupied elsewhere he looked at her trying to see her as she was now, not as he remembered her. Her lowered face glowed in the electrical light of a rather ugly and functional hanging lamp and showed the same light, flawless skin she had possessed when he had first known her. Only a few creases at the corners of her eyes and two shallow lines that ran down from her nostrils and bracketed her mouth bore witness to her age. She still carried herself with graceful pride, and her body did not betray her childbirth. Her hands that held open the diary remained as slender and elegant as he remembered them.

Lucius decided she was worth it. He leaned back and sipped his tea, waiting for her reaction upon finding out how her two loving sisters had played her. When it came, it surprised him, as Andromeda calmly closed the slim book and looked at him. He had expected an outbreak, fury, outrage.

"Why did you show me this, Lucius?" He gasped for breath, finding himself lost for words for once. Finally he leapt up in annoyance, not caring that his chair fell down behind him with a crash. He paced the room as he spoke. "Because it is the truth! Because you need to know! Because you are freed from the enchantment now and need to rid yourself of the unworthy muggle scum whose marriage is threatening your very life. Because you will return to me and we will be avenged on Bellatrix for her outrageous betrayal!"

Andromeda kept her dark eyes fixed on him, but now alertness showed in every line of her body. Her voice became louder as she answered him. "First of all don't confuse your facts, Lucius. The only ones who are threatening any lives here are you and your master, Lord Voldemort! Second, how can I be free of the enchantment? Narcissa writes that you need a second dose of the love potion to reverse its effect and she smashed the vial rather than undo the magic. For all I know I'm still bound in love to my husband. Unless…"

She, too, got up and Lucius cursed himself inwardly. He had let his frustration get the better of him and had given his plan away. Andromeda's eyes flitted to her empty mug next to Narcissa's diary, then to her visitor's face. "You did it, didn't you? You got another batch of the potion and put it in my tea when I left the room to hang up your robes."

With lightning speed her hand lashed out and made contact with his cheek. Before he had even fully realized the stinging pain he had captured her wrists in his fists and shook her, his annoyance giving way to anger now. "What do you think you're doing?"

She glared at him. "You miserable, underhanded bastard," she hissed. "Why do you think you are any better than them? You made another decision for me behind my back. You are exactly like Bellatrix! My sisters never asked me when they poisoned me, and neither did you when you repeated their actions. I was right about all you stupid, arrogant purebloods. You are all the same. To hell with you! I hate you!"

"Oh you hate me?" he replied hotly. "Well, why don't you get your facts straight? You should hate your sisters! They started it! They made you elope with this cretin! I am doing you a fucking favor, and what do I get?!"

At that moment they heard somebody clear their throat behind them, and as Lucius whirled around he looked into the half scared and half annoyed eyes of a tall lanky man with short-cropped brown hair in his late thirties. His lips lifted from his teeth in a snarl as he released Andromeda with a shove and pulled his wand from his cane. "Ted Tonks! I have so waited to meet you again."

The doctor swallowed, his face clearly showing his fear, but he still walked over to his wife and put his arms around her protectively. "Lucius Malfoy, isn't it? I remember you. You betrayed Andromeda to her father so she got expelled by her family. I would appreciate it if you did not hurt again," he said firmly. "Do with me what you will, but she has done nothing wrong this time."

Lucius huffed, leveling his wand at the couple. "What do you say, Andromeda?" he challenged the witch. "Do you still love him? Will you still die for him? Die with him?"

Andromeda briefly touched her husband's face in a gesture of such familiarity, of such gentleness and reassurance that Lucius had to fight to keep his composure. "Threatening death now, are we? So much for the promises of a Death Eater," she sneered when she finally turned towards him.

"Yes," she added quietly and firmly. "Of course I still love him. I loved him before Bellatrix' hair-brained plan; and I love him after your despicable maneuver. Why wouldn't I? I have shared twenty years of my life with him. We have a wonderful daughter together. He's my husband. Didn't you know love potions only compelled the unwilling? They have no effect on those who already are in love."

She stepped in front of her husband, again pulling out her wand. "I will fight for my life and his life. Do you want to fight me, Death Eater?" Lucius lowered his wand. "No," he said, his voice deadened. He had not known about the fact that the love potion had most likely been ineffective in both cases. That meant that Andromeda had done exactly what she wanted when she had left him for a muggle. The shame of it was almost too much to bear, but Lucius did not want to add insult to injury by retracting his former promise.

He exhaled. "I never came here to fight. I came here to lift the spell and win you back. I came here in defiance of everything I believe in, everything I fight for. I came here for love, not hate. If you will give me a few minutes alone to speak with you, I will leave you both alone and alive."

Both the wizard and the witch reluctantly lowered their wands and Andromeda slowly nodded. "I will speak with you. I guess I owe you that much, though I hated you for many years for your petty revenge of telling my father about Ted and me." She turned to her husband. "It's all right, Ted. Why don't you just settle in? I bet you had a long night. I'll be done in a few minutes. Don't worry."

She stepped to the kitchen door and motioned for Lucius to follow her. "Let's talk in the living-room." Lucius sheathed his wand with a snort and shrugged to straighten his robes. "Good," he said. "It will be interesting to hear how you managed to do all this without the help of a potion."

They entered the living room with Ted Tonks hanging behind in the front hall, looking both angry and worried. But obviously he knew enough about his wife's world to refrain from challenging a powerful wizard. Lucius looked back at him with a sneer as he firmly closed the parlor door in his face.

As he turned back towards Andromeda she whirled to face him, her black tresses flying. Her eyes were blazing at him in anger. "Why wouldn't I love him, Lucius? The stupid potion was as good as a sip of water! He was the only one who stood by me when everyone including my own parents turned their backs on me. He didn't love me for my money or my stupid pureblood ancestry. He loved me for me. And he has loved me for the last twenty years with loyalty and without fail. No one else has ever done that. Don't flatter yourself that you did. You yourself saw nothing but my ridiculously meaningless pure bloodline every time you looked at me."

He stared at her as if she had slapped him in the face again. "You really think that of me? Why would I be standing here talking to you if that were true?" He pulled the Dark Lord's list from his robes, shoved it into her hands. "Here, this is what I am supposed to do with you." She stared at the list of names. "That's us," she said uncomprehending. "What does it mean?"

He gave her a mirthless laugh. "It means these people are all dead. I killed them this very night at Voldemort's command." He was now furious enough that even the name of his master came over his lips without hesitation. "It means that if I had been following orders, I would have assassinated you and your precious muggle husband and your mudblood child by now." Andromeda staggered away from him, horror and disgust marring her beautiful face. "You have become a monster, Lucius. What happened to you? If my choice was the cause of this, I will never forgive myself."

Lucius looked at her, and for a moment she saw utter despair in his eyes. However when he spoke his face bore nothing but the expression of seething anger and she realized that while he would not kill any more this night, he would still stab her to her heart and enjoy it. "I have relished being a Death Eater," he told her coldly. "Every muggle that went down in agony before my magic bore the face of your husband. I have killed him a hundred times over. Every mudblood child I murdered I named to myself your rotten, treacherous offspring."

Andromeda felt tears spring to her eyes. "That is not true, Lucius. You are better than that. I won't believe it." He suddenly reached out and cupped her face. "No! Remember, I am all about wizarding ancestry. You just told me, you were nothing more to me than your 'meaningless pure bloodline'." He saw her cry openly now, but he ruthlessly quelled any pity he felt. He drank in the sight of her tears as one dying of thirst.

"I'm – I'm sorry I said that," she sobbed. "I wanted to be cruel. I wanted to tell myself you didn't care. Gods, how can I live with causing such hatred? Causing so much pain, so much death? Please, Lucius!" She felt the grip of his hands that held her face tighten to painful intensity. His grey eyes pierced her. And then, suddenly, inexplicably, he released her. For a moment he appeared to her as a young man again, nineteen years old, as she had once known him, with his life, his hope, his promise ahead of him.

"Andromeda, it was my choice, just as tonight is my choice, just as the consequences of sparing you will be my choice. I am powerless against this, as hard as I might try. Go with him if you love him. Go with him and warn your child and flee. I may swear not kill you, but there will be others. Let this be proof to you that I love you as much as you think he does – that I love you more. Remember this night. Go and know that you chose wrong, just as I did."

He stepped back from her and it felt to her as if each step put an immense distance between them. His face closed off to her and now reminded her of a mere mask. His grey eyes that had regarded her with fury, love, longing and concern only a split second ago became cold and hard. "We become the choices we make. You have made yours. I have made mine. I hope you can live with yours. I will live or die with mine. Go!"

He turned on his heel and strode out of the living room. Outside he bumped into Ted Tonks. He shoved him into the hallway wall without emotion, passing like a force of nature, unconcerned about the muggle in his path. He grabbed his robes from the coat hanger by the door and carelessly threw them over his shoulders. Outside, on the street he caught his breath pressing his hand on his chest. His heart seemed frozen.

He stilled and looked behind him at the house he'd left, at the woman he'd left, and through the bay window above the garden he saw the warm light of her living room and outlined before it in silhouette a woman and a man embracing. Ted Tonks and Andromeda Tonks were holding on to each other, and would for all eternity as far as he knew. He swayed with grief, blindly leaning on his cane to keep himself from falling, then clenched his teeth and ruthlessly tamped down his emotions. As he resumed walking he caught a soft fleeting movement off to his side, and a taunting, hoarse female laugh.

_Her _

Malfoy Manor, February 15th, 1976

I was at the ministry today to meet with some old friends from work and to get some cold potion from St. Mungo's dispensary for medical tinctures and tonics. The weather is simply dreadful; and old Mrs. Malfoy has been laid low with a miserable cough for over a week now.

Lucius is busy with some project or other that involves a lot of evening and night work. He won't talk about it to me, and he is in a terrible humor right now. I've decided not to ask after he gripped my wrist so hard the last time I tried to bring it up, I still have to pull my robe sleeves over the bruise.

I met up with Celia, who now works in the Department of Magical Law Enforcement as a forensic investigator. We went to the place where I first met Severus Snape – big mistake that one – and talked. Her job is really fascinating. She is not a poper auror, but they come to her when crimes have been committed, and they bring her articles from the crime scene like spell blasted clothes, or abandoned wands, or even the occasional corpse! And she needs to find out what magically happened.

She says that crimes of wizarding folk against muggles are particularly interesting, and that she has met a young muggle detective over one of the cases, who is convinced that witchcraft and what he calls the "paranormal" are real. She had to laugh so hard, though, when she told me that he believes that corn circles are caused by beings from other planets. I think she called them "extraterrestrials", when everyone knows it's just house elves when they are bored.

We had such a wonderful time! I need to go to London more often, and I will definitely make a point of meeting Celia whenever I go. She is still single and told me she is "experimenting", dating different wizards and finding out what she wants. I think that is very clever of her. At least she will be able to settle for someone she is thoroughly happy with. Still, she said I am everyone's envy among her other girl-friends for having snagged Lucius.

I told her that nothing looks quite like it seems at close quarters and that she can tell her friends that there are down-sides as well. But still her comments pleased me and comforted me. I guess I have to keep telling myself that I have married the most eligible bachelor around. That's quite a feat!

Then, just before we were going to pay and leave, she leaned in and asked me: "Do you want to know about your sister?" I thought she meant Bellatrix and nodded. "Well, Andromeda is pregnant," she said, and I sat back in shock.

No one had talked about her since she got disinherited, and I think I must have looked horrified. I thought the aurors might have found out about Bellatrix and me poisoning her, but Celia continued. "You know in November she applied for a handfasting license to the Ministry to marry that muggle doctor she was seeing. And she is still close with Trinna in Magical Imports. So she was talking to her the other day at the Leaky Cauldron during Trinna's lunch break and told her she was probably about two months gone."

I don't know what I said, but Celia grinned at me conspirationally. "I think it's so cool she just put up two fingers at tradition and followed her heart. Trinna says she's really happy. I'm happy for her. And as I'm sure your family won't tell you or don't want to know I thought I'd be the one to let you in on it. After all, she's your sister!"

I guess I thanked her, but really went to the hospital in a daze. Andy is married and will have a mudblood child. And Lucius and I are still waiting for me to get pregnant. She's beating me to it again. Damn her!


	12. The Choice

**The Choice**

_Him_

Lucius froze at the sound, his instincts kicking in immediately as he scanned the shadows. He gripped his cane, ready to pull his wand, and a moment later a dark-clad figure had stepped up to him, touching his elbow. "Nice going, Lucius! That wasn't by any chance one of the Dark Lord's assignments, was it?" The voice paused, then resumed with an edge of menace. "Because if it was, I notice that your charges are still very much alive. You didn't by any chance warn them, did you?"

The wizard whipped around and grabbed the woman by her robes. "Iocasta!" he hissed. "What are you doing here?" The witch laughed again. "Following you, Lucius," she said lazily. "That should be obvious, shouldn't it?" He shook her. "You little filthy spy! I told you not to cross me again."

Iocasta lifted her hands to the hood of her cloak and revealed her face. Her bruises from their last encounter had disappeared, and in the dim light she looked again uncannily like Andromeda. "You know, you got so high and mighty with me last time we met, just because of my muggle toy, and here you are, in direct defiance of an order of our master. Who do you think has deserved punishment more? You still haven't denied it."

He brought his face close to hers. "I deny nothing and I admit nothing. This is my own business. What do you want?" He still hadn't let go of her, and now she lifted a hand to run it along his jaw line. "Don't touch me!" he snarled. Her eyes narrowed. "I want you, Lucius. You must admit that our games together have been amusing and challenging. I doubt there aremany women out there, who can give you what you crave. I know there are few men out there, who can give me what I need."

Lucius snorted at her in contempt. "I am done with your 'games'," he said. "I told you I would not tolerate another pick-up attempt." Iocasta laughed again. "I know. I always listen very carefully to you, my dear. So I decided I needed some leverage if I wanted more of you. You know, for a night with you I might forget to tell the Dark Lord what I have seen here tonight."

The blond wizard grew completely still at her words and noticed that her dark eyes now scanned his face for a reaction. "_Locus illuminandus_," he finally incanted softly. A small star-shaped light formed over Iocasta's head indicating her position before him. There were no others. His lips slowly curved in a malicious smile "You come out here, by yourself, and think to blackmail me without witnesses. And you think you can compel me? You must be insane."

For the first time he read doubt in her face. Her self-assurance crumbled under his smile. "Do you really believe I would let someone live, who could implicate me with our master?" She squirmed in his grip now. "Lucius, you know I have no proof. I couldn't accuse you. I just wanted you back," she pleaded. He laughed out loud now. "You don't need proof with a _legilimens_ like Voldemort, you just tell him, and he finds out the rest for himself" he said coldly. "It doesn't pay to think with your cunt, Iocasta. You got it wrong when you threatened me, and you are getting it wrong again as you try to appease me now. I don't leave witnesses."

Her eyes widened in shock. "You don't mean that," she gasped. "Oh, but I do," he told her, suddenly feeling a sharp jolt of excitement at the thought of banishing the frustrations of the night in one last outburst of violence. He tightened his grip on his victim in preparation for an apparition, and moments later they stood on the gravel of the beach off Marine Drive just outside Rottingdean and far away from the eyes of curious muggles.

"You know I am at a loss, Iocasta," he taunted her as she looked around her in panic. "I know I'd like nothing more than to give you a painful death for your audacity. But I also know how much you enjoy pain. What a quandary: I'd hurt you only to please you. What do you think we should do?" She lifted her hands to plead with him, but he now felt high on anger, power and blood-thirst and barely heard her, as he disarmed her and pulled off her cloak. He shoved her away from him and with a lazy kick of his foot knocked out her legs from underneath her so she crashed down on the hard wet pebbles of the beach.

In the dark the waves rolled in in long noisy breakers that would drown out most sounds, and as Lucius looked down on the witch at his feet, a thought struck him. For a moment even he recoiled at the idea, but then stepped forward.

He had left his very last act of mercy far behind him, on the streets of a small East Sussex town, and it had been for a woman who had betrayed and never loved him. "You know my dear, ever since our last meeting I have wondered about the spell the Dark Lord used on Bellings. Our gatherings are always such wonderful opportunities to learn, are they not? And I really want to know whether I caught the curse correctly. I am sure even you will find the pain beyond your capacity for enjoyment."

"No, please, Lucius," she begged him, but he had already leveled his wand at her and intoned the ancient words he had heard his master speak. His name was the lastmenaingful sound she made, and as before he watched in detached fascination as the woman who had once resembled his love dissolved back into the common ingredients of existence, blood, bones, guts, slime. He heard Andromeda's anguished voice again: 'You have become a monster, Lucius. What happened to you? If my choice was the cause of this, I will never forgive myself.'

The dark mass on the ground before him lay finally still and Lucius found to his surprise that the cool breeze that blew in from the sea chilled his cheeks. He lifted his fingers to his face and touched wetness. The lights on the shore appeared blurred and he blinked rapidly. He had been crying and hadn't even felt it. In fact, he now felt nothing, not even anger. "I am what you have made me. What I have made myself. There is no forgiveness, for none of us." He vanished the sorry remnants of his spell and strode along the beach without looking back.

* * *

Lucius could not remember how long he had sat in his study, it might have been hours, but it seemed like days, even more timeless, like centuries. He felt like burnt-out ashes, bone-white, insubstantial, to be blown away on the force of a single breath. Nothing he knew, nothing he could do would change things now. Andromeda was truly lost to him forever. No spell, no potion would turn her, and even if he could, to compel her to love him would not mean anything. He would always know her love was not freely given, and he was done with lies and illusion. 

Between them Narcissa and Bellatrix had destroyed his life. The younger woman had deliberately taken away his happiness and love and the older one had tied him to the Dark Lord as surely as if she had set the mark on him herself. He clenched his teeth, biting back a howl of anguish and frustration. Suddenly in the cold embers of his despair he felt the kindling of a spark.

All his adult life he had hated and persecuted muggles and mudbloods. Every man, woman and child that he had killed had born the face of Ted Tonks and of Andromeda's mudblood offspring, the living proof of her betrayal of him. Yet, those that truly deserved his hatred had shared his bed and table and had come and gone freely in his house. He had respected them and cared for them and loved them as family.

Lucius' eyes traveled to his cane that never left his side. He watched the play of flames from the fireplace on the polished black wood and the pale silver of its handle. Encased in it there was his wand. How often had he seen green fire break from its tip, striking down his enemies in death and agony? He'd lost count over the years that he'd spent as a Death Eater. "One more time," he whispered.

He reached for the cane and slowly slid the slim wand from its sheath. The serpent grip lay cool and reassuring against his palm. The spark of hate he'd felt just seconds before flared into flame. For a moment he saw Narcissa, writhing before him under the _cruciatus_, confessing everything, begging him for mercy. "You and your sister never showed me any," he whispered.

And then, unbidden, he saw the face of his son. He recalled Draco in the school hospital last year, after the hippogriff attack, pale and shaken, the vicious slash from the beast's beak wrapped in bandages, and Narcissa sitting by the boy's side, holding him and soothing him. She was trying hard not to cry as she comforted Draco. He had looked on in fury at the incompetence of the teacher who had allowed this to happen to his only son and heir.

The image blurred, was replaced with the memory of a cool autumn day many years ago, etched into his mind. The tall doors to their bedchamber flew open as Bellatrix looked out and called to him as he was sitting nervously on a chair outside. "Lucius! You have a son." He had heard Narcissa's screaming inside for hours, helplessly wishing her pain away, angry at the custom of the old houses that kept wizards barred from the delivery room, and now saw her propped up in bed with the midwife cleaning up. His wife looked pale and exhausted, and there was so much blood. But then she had stretched out her hand and he had stepped up to her, and his mother had placed a small squalling bundle of cloth in his arms.

He had sat on the bed and placed the baby against Narcissa's chest, wondering how tiny and fragile it looked, never letting go and had held them both, his wife and his newborn son. He had been so proud of both of them. Now he realized that at that very moment he had not thought about Andromeda at all.

Lucius stilled and his eyes traveled to the small ruby vial that Severus had given him: 'One draught to bind in love, another to break the fetters.' He had broken Andromeda's fetters, she had been free to chose, and her choice was the one that had been made for her without her consent so many years ago, the one she would have made regardless. Here was his choice now, to undo what had been done to him, to take his revenge for the way he had been manipulated and betrayed or to accept it.

He could take his wand and make his way up into their bedroom. Narcissa might still be awake and waiting for him. He had not seen her or spoken to her in days. One spell would kill her. He thought again of Draco. What do you tell your son when you have killed his mother? More lies? Just as he had been lied to? The truth?

Slowly he placed the wand back on the dark wood of his desk. His fingers encircled the cut glass crystal of the love philter. "One draught to bind in love…" he murmured. Andromeda's choice had been easy. Ted had never betrayed her. He had been a suitor just like himself, taking his chances, and he had been chosen. As far as Lucius knew he had lived to be a loyal husband and father, despite the disgrace of his muggle status.

Andromeda had built half a lifetime's worth of love and memories with him. Lucius still recalled the last glimpse he had seen of them through the lit living room window, the man and the woman standing fused together in a tight embrace as the muggle had comforted her. The loneliness and envy he had felt at the sight had been almost unbearable. He hoped they would be safe by now and far beyond his or his master's reach.

For him choosing was not so easy. Kill his wife and he would lose his son, too. He had no doubt about that. But how do you will yourself to love someone you've come to hate? A love potion only compelled the unwilling, Andromeda had told him. Lucius looked one last time at his wand, his choice standing clear before him. He trailed his fingers over the chased silver scales of the serpent's head, then he slipped the ruby stopper from the small vial and brought the bottle to his lips.

The potion tasted bitter-sweet and Lucius was careful to leave one last sip at the bottom of the small flask. "…another to break the fetters, Narcissa, and I will, I swear," he whispered softly. One day he would take the second draught. One day when Draco was a grown man. It was possible to cross a Malfoy, but a Malfoy would never forget and never forgive.

* * *

_Her_

Malfoy Manor, September 21st 1976

This will be my last entry into Bella's diary. I haven't been writing much lately anyway as Lucius now has a packed social calendar and expects me to accompany him to all official functions. He's also set me quite a few tasks related to the support of various charities that will help him politically. He's a very ambitious man, and we are extremely busy.

Also with old Mr. Malfoy having died last week there is so much changing and rearranging going on in the house, I'm just afraid the book could fall into the wrong hands. There are house elves all over the place, getting into everything! I've tried to vanish it the other night, but of course it would be enchanted if it was a present from my sister, and I could not make it disappear or destroy it. It just seems to be impervious to magic.

I certainly would not want Mrs. Malfoy or Lucius to ever find out what happened last year, as I think he would be terribly mad at Bella and me. So I am at a bit of a loss what to do. I might talk to Celia about it. I know she works in magical law enforcement, but we've stayed such good friends even after school and have met and talked a lot over the last few months. She wouldn't betray me and might help and take the book off me. With her knowledge of spells perhaps she even knows what to do with the diary. At least it will be beyond Lucius' reach that way.

I also think that I might want Celia to know the truth. I haven't been able to talk to anyone about what Bella and I did, and I'm not as close to her any more as I used to be. The more time passes, the more I think I was wrong to follow my sister's advice. I feel bad about Andromeda, who now has a baby girl as I have heard. I've been married to Lucius for almost a year now, and while I am generally happy to be his wife, I also know he has faults, and I am not as naïve as I was when I first fell in love with him.

I really hope Andy is happy with her muggle and that she can give my niece a good home and a good upbringing. It would be nice if I could meet her, and see her daughter, but my parents would forbid it, and I think Lucius would be furious if I went in secret and he found out. I think the best would be to be rid of this record of what I did, to forget it ever happened and to get on with my life.

Oblivion can be a good thing after all I guess.

* * *

This concludes "The Serpent and the Unicorn". I hope you all enjoyed it.

My thanks go to all my faithful reviewers: Sesshomaru's Angel, Chaos Chick 3, the ever faithful chisox727 and Sternenlicht, mintika, JakieMarie,Hungarian Horntail, Sionnain, Midnight Lilly, Redcandle17 and of course Alys, jewels, Lady Lizzie, fenphoenix, reginastrix, Captain Grey, Dutchwench, Lucrecia and Eilian from UYJI. You kept me writing! Thank you!!!


End file.
